Is the Groom Jealous? Is It Okay to Invite All My Male Friends to the Wedding?

2018.06.25 published

Consultation from brides-to-be＊

Hello, I am Haruno Tsuzaki, the editor of marry＊

At marry, we have a project where brides-to-be share their concerns, and graduates and other brides-to-be in similar situations answer anonymously.

This time's concern is as follows＊

The content is whether it's okay to invite more male friends to the after-party than the groom's female friends if one has many male friends...

Here are the responses we received, in no particular order ♡

Response 1 from a bride with many male friends

I also had mostly male friends🤣

I invited all my male friends to the ceremony, reception, and after-party😁

If the groom doesn't mind, please invite your close male friends☺️

Response 2 from a bride with many male friends

I didn't care w

The groom also had about 30% female friends among the guest list, and I also had about the same number of male friends!

Overall, about 70% of the after-party guests were his friends and about 30% were mine.

If you want to invite them, there's no need to worry about the ratio.

Since there won't be family or older people at the after-party, it should be fine!?

Response 3 from a bride with many male friends

Most of my after-party guests were male friends! Lol

There were definitely more than the groom's friends!

But friends around me thought they were the groom's friends, so it wasn't like "Wow, the bride has a lot of male friends!"

Response 4 from a bride with many male friends

Since there were a lot of male friends in my university and workplace,

there were many more male friends invited by the bride than the female friends invited by the groom.

However, the after-party had more guests from the bride's side than the groom's side, so I wasn't too concerned about the gender ratio.

For the after-party, I invited people I wanted to maintain good relationships with and those I felt grateful to, and my husband agreed to it.

Just looking at the bride's guests, there might have been more male friends than female friends.

If your husband agrees, I don't think it would be a problem to invite them!!

Response 5 from a bride with many male friends

I work in a general position, and naturally, most of my colleagues are male.

He understands this, so he says it can't be helped.

That said, I think he might not feel good about it, so I plan to invite the minimum number of male guests to the reception and primarily invite them to the after-party!

Response 6 from a bride with many male friends

I also invited my male friends to both the reception and the after-party!

I didn't particularly mind the number of the groom's female friends! Lol

I think it's okay if your husband doesn't mind, right? ◡̈⃝︎

Response 7 from a bride with many male friends

I have about three male friends that I'm grateful to, and I'm inviting them from the reception☺︎

Originally, there were few guests on my side, but I happened to want to express my gratitude to males this time 😊

Of course, I'll invite a few more people to the after-party!

I hope you have a wonderful wedding💐

Response 8 from a bride with many male friends

The groom didn't invite any female friends, but almost half of my invited guests were male friends, lol

The groom's parents said they didn't mind that, so it was fine 😌❗

The groom also knew about my many male friends, so there was no problem.

Response 9 from a bride with many male friends

I'm a bride-to-be with a July wedding in Shizuoka👰

About 10% of the groom's side are male guests. I conveyed that I want to invite this type of friend, and he said, "Then let's invite them!!"

Response 10 from a bride with many male friends

I also have many male friends, and he has known that since we were dating, so I invited them without caring for the after-party!

I didn't invite male friends to the wedding reception due to the parents' and bosses' eyes, but since the after-party was just close friends, that was fine ^ ^

Since there was no seating plan, we didn't coordinate the number of guests from each other either.

Friends are friends, regardless of gender, and I think male friends would be happy to be invited to the after-party!

Response 11 from a bride with many male friends

I didn't mind and invited a lot of male friends!!

Thanks to that, my university and high school friends had a reunion-like atmosphere (＾ν＾)

Moreover, my husband also graduated from the same university, so he unexpectedly connected with my male friends, and we all had fun together! ( ^ω^ )

Response 12 from a bride with many male friends

I plan to invite more men to the 1.5 after-party😌

This is because there are fewer guests from my husband's side, and I want to reduce the feeling of being out of place.

If you discuss with your husband and he doesn’t feel uncomfortable about it, I think there’s no need to force a balance!

Response 13 from a bride with many male friends

I think it's more important to invite people you want rather than try to balance it out.

It does depend on the husband's feelings, though.

I hope this helps!

Response 14 from a bride with many male friends

We decided to invite the people we wanted without worrying about the ratio, so I invited quite a few male friends.

Of course, I conveyed who my friends are to my husband.

Since we both invited who we wanted to invite, there wasn’t much concern on either side, and having more men made it lively, which made it very fun (^^)

Response 15 from a bride with many male friends

I consulted with my husband about it,

but I’ll invite my important friends regardless of the number!

Response 16 from a bride with many male friends

Excuse me for the comment! I graduated last week!

I don’t think there’s a need to worry about it for the after-party!

I wanted to invite my football club members, but since I couldn't invite them to the ceremony, I had everyone come to the after-party!

We made the after-party free seating, unlike the ceremony!

With the ceremony, the guests are separated into the groom's side and the bride's side, which could cause concerns for some, but I think it’s okay if it’s a free seating arrangement♪

Response 17 from a bride with many male friends

I invited male friends to the ceremony and reception 💡

My side had five male friends, while the groom had two female friends.

(Originally, I planned to invite seven, but two couldn’t make it…)

I didn't care much about it! Lol

But I didn’t create a table just for my male friends; I mixed them with female friends 💡

At the after-party, I think my husband’s female friends were probably more than mine! 🙄

Response 18 from a bride with many male friends

I think it's totally fine if your husband doesn't mind💡

We both honestly tend to care, but we also had a desire to invite who we wanted, so

we discussed it and decided to invite the people we want without worrying!

If you're concerned about societal perceptions, that’s something else, but I think at the after-party, you don't have to worry about that!

If there's no seating plan, it’s all mixed up, so I don't think anyone would care...

Since it’s a once-in-a-lifetime occasion, I think it's best to invite as many of those you want to come as possible. 😊💓

Response 19 from a bride with many male friends

I had twice as many male friends at the after-party than the groom had female friends!

He already knew that I had many male friends and they all participated in their respective celebrations.

Friends are friends, regardless of whether they are male or female 🤗

The male friends who attended said my husband was handsome and they got along well, even making plans to hang out together, so I felt it was really nice!

Response 20 from a bride with many male friends

I plan to invite male friends to the wedding.

On the other hand, the groom doesn’t seem to have any female friends, and he’s only inviting male friends to both the wedding and the after-party 😂

If your husband is resistant to inviting male friends, it might be better to refrain from inviting them, but if he doesn’t mind, I think you can invite them!

Especially for the after-party, I think it will become more casual than the reception, so it’s okay to just enjoy it without worrying about the eyes of family, etc.😊

Response 21 from a bride with many male friends

The groom isn't inviting any women. I'm planning to invite 20 men.

I knew this would happen from the start, so

he just laughed and said, "Well, it can't be helped."

Response 22 from a bride with many male friends

I also have many male friends, and if I invited everyone I wanted, it would have turned out to be more than double the number of women guests that the groom would invite.

So on the actual day, since there would be family around during the wedding reception, I restricted the number of male guests.

When I communicated this, my male friends understood, and I managed to limit the bride's guests to four out of fifty-six.

There were five female guests from the groom’s side.

Since the groom and I are from the same hometown and have many mutual friends, I wasn't too concerned about the gender ratio.

At the after-party, since there were no family members around, we both listed out who we wanted to invite in advance and communicated and understood each other’s choices.

There were 15 of my male friends who came to the after-party.

The groom's female guests slightly increased to seven.

Because we knew this in advance, we could enjoy ourselves without worrying 💐✨

Response 23 from a bride with many male friends

I focused on selecting only my closest friends among my male friends!

Should we care about the bride's male friends?

Inviting male friends from the bride's side to the wedding.

Whether to invite them to the reception or the after-party might vary greatly based on the couple’s perspectives and feelings...

Surprisingly, many people seem to have the stance of

"I’ll invite them without hesitation! It’s even less of an issue for the after-party!"

However, it’s true that if one has been a club manager or studied in a science-related school,

it's likely that they would have more male friends…!

Having many friends is a wonderful thing ♡

As long as the couple discusses thoroughly and understands each other, it seems there’s no issue if there’s no jealousy♩