"Unforgettable! Experiences of Terrible Things Done by Friends and Acquaintances at Weddings"

2018.11.25 published

Weddings Can Be Full of Unexpected Troubles...

A wedding is a once-in-a-lifetime stage for the bride and groom.

While preparing for the day, they want to make it the best day ever, but often run into issues related to human relationships.

Weddings and funerals. They are said to be a process of “settling human relationships” and “inventorying” one's connections, revealing the nature of each individual.

In this article, we will introduce experiences shared via DM on marry's Instagram about "horrible things done by friends and acquaintances at weddings."

Experiences of Wedding Troubles with Friends and Acquaintances 1

The trouble with the wedding was with the groom's relatives. Particularly, the aunt was meddling too much.

She was even looking for wedding venues on her own.

I had already declined her help, explaining that there is a wedding consultation agency affiliated with my own store, and that I could get a better deal by going directly to them.

However, then she demanded to see the estimate and started complaining.

After explaining that I received a much cheaper rate than others, she seemed to accept it...

Yet after that, she went out of her way to inform me of the transportation costs for her sons (who, from my husband's perspective, are cousins), suggesting that I consider a total of 200,000 yen for two families.

The bride's side had already said that transportation costs were not a problem...

When I told the aunt that 200,000 yen was too much for us to cover entirely, she replied,

"I'm not saying you have to pay it. I just wanted to know how much it cost," but later asked, "Are you going to pay for the transportation?"

It seems she really wanted to interfere and take control of the situation.

Experiences of Wedding Troubles with Friends and Acquaintances 2

The terrible thing did not happen on the day of the wedding, but during the preparation phase.

I will never forget it. I have had no contact with that friend since.

I invited a close female friend and received a response postcard from her.

However, just a week before the wedding, I learned from someone that an ex-boyfriend was among the guests, and she informed me that she would not attend if the ex was there.

Moreover, she said...

"I don’t want to remember my ex, and it’s cruel to invite me to the wedding. I feel sick now because I remembered him due to your wedding. It's your fault I feel this way."

Apparently.

This friend broke up with her ex eight years ago. Now, she has a new boyfriend and they are very much in love.

I understand if her breakup was terrible and she doesn’t want to see him, but I didn't want my happy time just a week before the wedding to be ruined.

Additionally, I got along very well with that ex, and hearing negative comments about him from my friend was very frustrating.

Since it was just a week before the ceremony, all the payments and seating arrangements were in the final decision stage.

I had to start over from scratch.

She even told me to let her skip the payment, which frustrated me because it wasn't a problem that could be solved with money, but I responded calmly.

"It seems that was such a terrible memory for you. I'm sorry for not being considerate enough.

However, I wanted to invite a dear friend and show my gratitude. It feels upsetting to hear bad things about that dear friend.

You don't have to worry about paying me." I communicated this.

Now, I don’t have any contact with that girl at all.

Although it is an unpleasant memory, I’m glad that nothing happened on the wedding day when she participated!

The day turned out to be a wonderful memory!

Experiences of Wedding Troubles with Friends and Acquaintances 3

A woman who is a friend of my husband stepped on my dress, tearing my precious wedding dress.

She knew she had ripped the dress but just made a worried face and didn't apologize.

I wondered if she couldn't say anything at that moment?

I thought she might apologize just to my husband when I wasn’t around, but nothing came.

Since she is a friend of my husband, I rarely see her, so thankfully I avoided her, but, as a fellow woman, I felt very disappointed. 😭

Fortunately, I had insurance for the dress, so I didn’t incur repair costs, but since it was an imported dress, I shudder to think what would have happened if I hadn’t taken that insurance...

Experiences of Wedding Troubles with Friends and Acquaintances 4

I thought we were close friends, but shortly before the wedding, I received a message saying she couldn't come.

That was right after I attended her wedding.

I was so angry at how transparent it was that she wanted me to go to her wedding while she couldn’t come to mine, that I decided to keep a certain distance!

Experiences of Wedding Troubles with Friends and Acquaintances 5

If they were true friends, they wouldn’t do horrible things. They would genuinely wish for your happiness and celebrate more than anyone.

That’s what true friends are.

After being treated like that, is there really a need to stay friends?

I haven’t had any major troubles with friends, but I was ignored after announcing my marriage.

It made me think I probably wouldn’t have any further involvement with them.

Experiences of Wedding Troubles with Friends and Acquaintances 6

I didn't experience this during the ceremony, but I asked my best friend to be the receptionist.

Maybe she took it as wedding high (I think there was jealousy too).

She blocked me on LINE, and I have no contact with her now.

For me, this is a once-in-a-lifetime wedding, so I wanted her there more than anyone else, but for her, it was just one of many weddings.

I believe weddings are a good opportunity to find out who your true friends are.

Experiences of Wedding Troubles with Friends and Acquaintances 7

I could only invite 9 friends to my wedding.

They are all kind and loving people, but during the bouquet toss, when I threw the bouquet, nobody tried to catch it...

I thought maybe they were too kind and didn't want to take it from someone else, so I could accept that, but...

After the bouquet fell, a friend said, "It hit A-chan when it fell, so A-chan can take it,” and handed it to her, but,

A-chan clearly acted like she didn’t want it, and I was extremely shocked...

A-chan was one of five girls in a group that included me, and we had a good relationship, but since then, we haven't met alone.

In fact, I don't want to meet two of us 💦

I imagined that everyone would get excited over the bouquet toss, so I was surprised by their reactions 💦💦

The bouquet toss is the one thing from my wedding I'd want to redo. 😞

Experiences of Wedding Troubles with Friends and Acquaintances 8

I was almost invited into a pyramid scheme for health foods.

We’re still on good terms now.

She recommended health foods to me while she was recovering from childbirth, as I was on a diet.

I attended a seminar, but it was obviously a pyramid scheme.

The products may have been good, but they were quite expensive and I didn’t know if they were effective, so I never bought anything. Haha!

Experiences of Wedding Troubles with Friends and Acquaintances 9

Depending on the nature of the horrible things, a wedding is also an opportunity to reassess future relationships...

If you or your family have been treated terribly in a way that would disadvantage you in your future interactions with that person, then I think it’s fine to cut ties.

There’s no need to endure it. When you get married, your environment changes, and you'll encounter new connections as your family expands. 💦

Experiences of Wedding Troubles with Friends and Acquaintances 10

The gift money issue (a common occurrence?)

A colleague at work, a junior who is three years younger than me, gave me only 10,000 yen as a congratulatory gift.

I thought it was a mistake, but it was clearly written on the envelope...

Did I do something bad? Do I lack common sense? Did he think it was fine because he was my junior?

I was really surprised since I talked to him almost every day. 😭

I managed to come to terms with it as it’s a matter of feelings, but it was the biggest incident from my wedding. 💦

For about a week after the ceremony, it was tough for me to talk to that kid. 💦

Experiences of Wedding Troubles with Friends and Acquaintances 11

I personally handed the invitation to my best friend from high school,

who said, “I’m really looking forward to it! I’m definitely going! I've even booked my flight!!!”

Yet, I received no reply to the invitation. 😣

She appeared to be so excited, so I sent reminders about the RSVP and bus information, but...

There was still no response...

That girl tends to be loose with communication, so I went ahead and made all the arrangements for seating and so on.

However, on the day of the event, I received no contact and she didn’t show up...

After that, I didn’t hear from her at all.

On that day, she posted on Instagram, “I had a really fun beauty seminar!” 😤

Since then, I haven't contacted her.

I’d like to block her on LINE and Instagram, but I think that would lower my level as a person, so I’ll leave it as it is.

Experiences of Wedding Troubles with Friends and Acquaintances 13

A friend of mine had a story about someone backing out of a performance just a month before her wedding.

Another friend had a terrible person cancel a week prior.

When the bride reported this to me, I suggested reaching out to local friends, and I remember we managed to put together a performance at short notice within the month!

My friend who was canceled on a week before also had her friends jump in to perform the night before!

I realized that in times of trouble, only those old, close friends are truly reliable.

I also felt that those who are not recent bride/groom experiences treat weddings like they are someone else's affair.

I had just gotten married a while back, so I deeply understood the difficulties and genuinely wanted to help.

Experiences of Wedding Troubles with Friends and Acquaintances 14

I was really shocked when a friend of my husband was caught smoking an IQOS inside the wedding venue.

Since my husband is a teacher and many of his colleagues attended, it felt disappointing to see people who acted so inconsiderately as friends.

After that, my husband has also distanced himself from that friend.

I believe those people will realize their inconsiderate actions when they have their own wedding someday.

Hate the sin, not the sinner!

A wedding is an opportunity for important people to come together.

It’s truly saddening when someone you invited with the intention of "I want to invite you!" or "I want to share the same time!" treats you badly.

"I can’t believe this person did that to me...."

"I can’t believe this person is like this...."

It can leave you feeling shocked and unable to recover.

You might think, "I never want to be with them again!" or "I don’t want to see them ever again!"

However, if you can behave maturely by reciting the phrase "Hate the sin, not the sinner..."

there may come a day when that person treats you kindly...??!

I hope for that!