"What to Do When You Change Jobs Right Before Your Wedding: Who Should You Invite from Work?"

2021.01.08 published

Wedding Troubles Consultation＊

*********

I am struggling with whom to invite as workplace guests.

We are getting married in May next year, but it seems that both my husband and I will be transferring in April.

If we get married right after the transfer.

Should we invite colleagues and bosses from the new location, or those from before the transfer...?

I'm curious about what most people do in the world.

The people I have been indebted to so far are from my current department.

However, the people I will rely on in the future are from the new department, so I'm unsure about what to do.

*********

This is certainly a dilemma.

I conducted a survey on marry's Instagram story, and I will share all the responses received♡

How to Handle Workplace Guests When There’s a Job Transfer or Change of Employment Around the Wedding?

I also had my wedding around the time of my transfer!

I was unsure whether to invite workplace colleagues, but if I did, I would inevitably have to invite both the new and old colleagues... so I considered it.

After considering the venue capacity, I realized that family would take up a lot of seats, so I boldly chose not to invite any colleagues! I informed my workplace colleagues that my focus would be on family.

It may depend on the workplace culture, but my workplace had frequent transfers, so there were others who also chose not to invite colleagues. That made me feel more comfortable with my decision.

How to Handle Workplace Guests When There’s a Job Transfer or Change of Employment Around the Wedding? 2

I wanted to invite those who have helped me, so I will invite people from my previous workplace! I thought it might be a burden to invite new workplace colleagues who don’t know me well💦

I also felt it could be inconsiderate to invite them right after transferring💦

How to Handle Workplace Guests When There’s a Job Transfer or Change of Employment Around the Wedding? 3

I am getting married in May as well, and my husband is unexpectedly transferring in March...

Since I had already asked a former boss from my previous workplace, who knows both me and my boss to give a speech, I asked my new boss for the toast 😊💕

I was torn about inviting both, but after hearing similar experiences from other brides, I made my decision ^_^

How to Handle Workplace Guests When There’s a Job Transfer or Change of Employment Around the Wedding? 4

I changed jobs three months before my wedding!

I had three close colleagues at my previous company, and they all came when I invited them❤

Initially, we had all agreed to invite each other to our weddings!

Even though those colleagues are now scattered across Japan, we have continued to stay in touch✩

I did not invite anyone from the new workplace! Since I had only worked there briefly, it felt awkward to invite them. ^^;

Instead, I brought gifts of sweets when I returned to work after the wedding! I had taken a week off around the wedding, so it was also a thank you for that.

In my case, I completely changed companies, so it might not be useful as a reference for transfers😣

How to Handle Workplace Guests When There’s a Job Transfer or Change of Employment Around the Wedding? 5

I am having my wedding on May 11 🙋‍♀️

My husband and I were in a workplace romance, so although we were in different departments, we work for the same company.

And I just transferred on April 1 from the store I had been at for three years.

I decided to only invite people from my previous workplace. I haven't reached out to anyone from the new store staff.

☑ It was cumbersome to increase the number of guests and rethink the seating arrangements from April 1

☑ Is it appropriate to invite a boss I’ve only known for a month?

☑ Would it be a burden for them to bring a gift?

☑ Would they think I’m only inviting them for the money?

This is what I considered🙋‍♀️

How to Handle Workplace Guests When There’s a Job Transfer or Change of Employment Around the Wedding? 6

I will be having my wedding seven months after my job transfer; I’m inviting my current boss and four senior colleagues, and the main speaker will be my current boss!

However, I also want to invite five people from my previous workplace because I’m close to them and would love for them to come \( ¨̮ )/

I informed my former boss beforehand that they would be in the friend category and got their approval!

The titles on the seating chart for former colleagues will be:

Former Company Boss, Former Company Senior, Former Company Colleague, but I won’t be asking for speeches; they’ll be sitting in the front row but won’t have a special role.

They’ll also attend the second party ( ˊᵕˋ )

How to Handle Workplace Guests When There’s a Job Transfer or Change of Employment Around the Wedding? 7

A friend of mine faced the same issue and invited both former and new colleagues.

The new colleagues were mostly just my superiors given the lack of a relationship.

How to Handle Workplace Guests When There’s a Job Transfer or Change of Employment Around the Wedding? 8

I think you should invite the people you want to invite♪

By the way, I also had a transfer before my wedding and invited a few colleagues I was particularly close to and have continued to meet and drink with each month!

How to Handle Workplace Guests When There’s a Job Transfer or Change of Employment Around the Wedding? 9

I resigned from my job a year before my wedding after working there for five years.

I was close to several staff members there, and since I had consulted about my husband even before the engagement, I invited them!

I started at my new job six months before my wedding, but since I felt less familiarity compared to my previous workplace and they didn’t know me or my husband at all, I thought it would be awkward to invite them.

So, I explained that I would be having a small wedding with only family and a few friends at my new workplace.

How to Handle Workplace Guests When There’s a Job Transfer or Change of Employment Around the Wedding? 10

I have a wedding planned for July and will be changing jobs in June, so I am also in a dilemma about who to invite.

I consulted with my planner, who advised me that, “If you plan to have a long-term relationship, it’s better to invite people from your previous workplace.”

So I decided to mainly invite people from my current workplace and a few direct superiors from my new workplace.

As for the toast, I was also unsure, but I decided to ask a boss I have worked with for a longer time rather than one I had only known for one to two months after my transfer.

(In that case, I was also told it would be good to notify the new boss ahead of time.)

How to Handle Workplace Guests When There’s a Job Transfer or Change of Employment Around the Wedding? 11

If you are transferring in April and having your wedding in May, I think it’s fine to just invite those from your previous workplace.

I also changed jobs after getting married! Plus, I’m in a workplace romance with my husband. So I only invited colleagues from my previous workplace 💡

I started at my new job just two months before the wedding! I thought it would be awkward for them to invite me to a wedding just after joining.

After all, the reason we decided to hold the wedding was to show appreciation to those who have helped us, so we came to that decision together.

After receiving a telegram from people from the new workplace, I brought them sweets as a thank you and shared photos, which has kept our relationship good afterwards 🙆❤

I think it would be nice to bring some sweets to the new workplace to greet everyone!

How to Handle Workplace Guests When There’s a Job Transfer or Change of Employment Around the Wedding? 12

A colleague from the same company had a similar situation to yours. They had been in the same department for a long time, and just when invitations were sent out, the transfer notice came through.

They invited everyone from the former department and only the immediate superior from the new department (as it was a newly established department with fewer people).

Their old department boss gave the toast!

They also confirmed with the new superior around the time of the transfer whether they could additionally invite them, saying "I have a wedding coming up; would you be able to attend?"

How to Handle Workplace Guests When There’s a Job Transfer or Change of Employment Around the Wedding? 13

My fiancé changed jobs one month before our wedding.

I explained the situation to both bosses before and after the transfer and let them decide on who would give the toasts (in the end, the boss from after the transfer ended up being the speaker).

The invitees from the previous workplace were chosen at the request of the groom. From the post-transfer side, only two or three immediate bosses were invited.

I think it’s about navigating workplace relationships, so if you choose to invite people from the previous workplace, it’s a good idea to be aware of who will attend (especially the bosses) → inform the boss from the new workplace → make your selections of who to invite and get feedback... that way, there won’t be any trouble.

How to Handle Workplace Guests When There’s a Job Transfer or Change of Employment Around the Wedding? 14

I am also getting married next weekend in May! I faced the same troubles! 😭

I sent invitations at the beginning of March and invited my former boss.

Many people seem to invite those from their current workplace, but the planner said it’s not strange to do either!

Once the transfer destination was announced, it felt awkward to approach someone who hasn’t had any interaction with me before and invite them to an event, right? 😹

I hope you consult with your husband and come to a consensus 😊

How to Handle Workplace Guests When There’s a Job Transfer or Change of Employment Around the Wedding? 15

I resigned and moved due to my fiancé’s job, so I’ve decided not to invite anyone from my new workplace! Of course, none from my previous workplace either.

I figure a post-hoc announcement is fine. So, my fiancé decided not to invite any either! If there were workplace people there, it might create tension, so we’re choosing not to include them to avoid awkwardness!

How to Handle Workplace Guests When There’s a Job Transfer or Change of Employment Around the Wedding? 16

I invited all the main guests and company guests from my previous workplace.

In terms of inviting and entertaining those who have helped me, it might be better to have people from the prior workplace.

However, you might want to notify your new boss just in case^^

How to Handle Workplace Guests When There’s a Job Transfer or Change of Employment Around the Wedding? 17

Regarding the story you mentioned!

I also had my wedding in April, but my boss was changed due to personnel transfers that month.

The announcement of the personnel transfer was around March 10, and it coincided with the invitation deadline, so I didn’t invite the new boss…

Since I had no prior acquaintance with them, it was unthinkable for me to reach out for an invitation, so I had never intended to invite anyone.

My classmate who had a wedding in June invited people from both the old and new workplaces, but I think it’s fine not to invite anyone in April!

How to Handle Workplace Guests When There’s a Job Transfer or Change of Employment Around the Wedding? 18

I am also getting married in May next year, and I have my transfer scheduled for April!

I will be reliant on the new transfers, but I’ve only known them for a month...

As a standard for choosing invitees, I decided to invite those who have helped us thus far and I would like to continue my relationship with going forward.

So I plan to invite people from my previous workplace ( ˘ω˘ )!

How to Handle Workplace Guests When There’s a Job Transfer or Change of Employment Around the Wedding? 19

I was in exactly the same position. The wedding is in May, and I realized I had to send out invitations in March.

Initially, I reached out to my former boss to send an invitation.

Then, the notification for the transfer came out in April, and unsurprisingly, I was transferred. Since I was still in the stage where I could add more guests, I considered whether to invite my new boss, but since I had never interacted with them before, I thought it would be awkward.

After consulting my former boss, they assured me it was perfectly fine not to invite them (laughs), so I decided not to invite them.

I was told it would just be a notification about the wedding and the fact that I couldn’t invite them, so we will only be inviting my previous workplace's bosses.

How to Handle Workplace Guests When There’s a Job Transfer or Change of Employment Around the Wedding? 20

When I was notified about the transfer, I was still able to add guests, so I invited people from both my former and new departments.

Most people tend to invite their previous department's boss or colleagues!

The survey results showed that most people choose to invite their colleagues and bosses from the places where they worked the longest, rather than people from their new transfer.

For those who are saying, “What if it goes this way, and it’s very troubling.....!”, it might be better to plan the wedding outside the time of the transfer.