[Simple Question] Should You Add "Sama" to the Name Field on Family Place Cards and Seating Charts?

2021.05.04 published

Should You Use "Sama" with Parents, Family, and Relatives?

When writing guest names on items like place cards and seating charts, it is customary to use "Sama".

This is, of course, common knowledge＊

But…

Should "Sama" be used with parents, family, and relatives as well?

Generally, "Sama" is Unnecessary for Family!

Mothers, fathers, and grandparents are important people for the bride and groom.

On the wedding day, they are also the ones you want to treat well, so some might think, "Isn't it okay to use 'Sama'?" However, generally, you do not use honorifics for relatives (parents and siblings).

This is because the wedding is fundamentally viewed as "both families hosting the guests".

For family members who lived in the same household before marriage, "Sama" is not used.

Parents and unmarried siblings belong to both families. Since they are on the hosting side, "Sama" is not used.

However!!!

For grandparents, uncles, aunts, and cousins, it is generally standard to use "Sama".

(Because they belong to different households.)

@___capitano

When considering relationships in terms of household units, it becomes straightforward, but let me explain each relationship.

《To Parents》

Do not use "Sama"

☑ How to Write: Groom (Bride) Father (Mother) Full Name

Place cards are only for the Groom (Bride) Father (Mother).

It’s okay not to include the full name.

《Unmarried Siblings》

Do not use "Sama"

☑ How to Write: Groom (Bride) Brother/Sister Full Name

Place cards can simply include the full name without titles.

《Married Siblings》

When siblings are married, it is a common belief that they belong to different households. Therefore, "Sama" is often used.

(However, if they live together even after marriage, they may be considered a single household, and "Sama" may not be used.)

How to Write: Groom (Bride) (In-law) Brother/Sister Full Name + Sama

Place cards can simply include the full name without titles.

《Co-living Grandparents》

If grandparents live together, they can be considered a single household, so it's okay not to use "Sama".

How to Write: Groom (Bride) Grandfather (Grandmother) Full Name

Place cards can simply include the Groom (Bride) Grandfather or Grandmother without the full name.

It’s Okay to Use "Sama" on Place Cards＊

I have introduced the basic way to add titles.

In conclusion, while it is generally safe not to use "Sama" for family members on the seating chart, it is acceptable to use it on place cards. If you really want to use honorifics for family, it's not an issue.

The "honorifics" used for parents and family can be embarrassing if done incorrectly.

I don't think guests will feel upset if the seating chart includes honorifics for family, but you might come across as ignorant of social norms…!

Please be careful when creating seating charts and place cards＊

➡ Things You Absolutely Don’t Want to Get Wrong! 6 Common Careless Mistakes to Know in Advance About Seating Charts

➡ Caution Regarding Paper Items＊ Did You Know That Punctuation Such as "。" and "、" is Not Allowed at Weddings?

@___capitano