"How to Surprise a Couple Who Didn't Have a Wedding with a Special Celebration?"

2019.11.21 published

I want to surprise my guests with something wedding-like♡

A consultation arrived at marry with this kind of concern.

They want to present a surprise production that feels like a wedding to guests who are a couple that hasn’t had their own wedding yet at their own wedding.＊

Indeed, it might be hard to think of something besides the cake cutting right away.

We will share all the responses we gathered through marry’s story♡

【Response 1】

I am a wedding MC and planner!

How about having the couple make a surprise appearance during the cake moment, explaining the purpose, and simply placing a veil on the wife, then preparing a separate cake (like a whole cake) for them to do a cake cutting together?

I think this will allow them to experience a bit of the wedding feel!

Or maybe it would be better to have them appear at a moment other than during the cake (><)

If that's the case, after the entrance of the bride and groom, have the wife and husband make their entrance from separate doors! They would be surprised to see each other! They could walk hand in hand to the bride and groom's side ❤

...What do you think?

Also, what about having the MC introduce it as a surprise from the bride and groom to the couple who haven't had their wedding yet, and present them with a commemorative gift?

【Response 2】

It sounds wonderful‼︎ 😭✨✨ I believe the guests would be happy just with that feeling...

(If you can prearrange with the guest’s husband) at a moment like reading a telegram, you could have the guest’s husband appear with a bouquet → and propose in front of everyone

➡︎ During the outfit change, present a bouquet to the guest’s wife. Have her wear a bride-like headband, and have both couples exit together.

How about that? ☺️

【Response 3】

For a bouquet pull, how about attaching a tag with that person’s name to the bouquet from the start, ensuring that they are guaranteed to win?

I did something similar where I predetermined who would get the winning string and made it a setup!

Everyone got really excited saying, “What’s that?!”

If you attach a large name tag to the bouquet from the beginning, it will clearly show that it’s a setup to everyone and make it more exciting!!

【Response 4】

I didn't have a wedding, but I was able to participate in a first bite at a friend's wedding ❤︎

【Response 5】

I would talk to the friend’s husband and sneak out of the venue →

Have the MC say that it seems there is a gift for the important people of the bride and groom, and bring the friend’s wife in front →

Have the friend’s husband appear with a bouquet and have the MC explain it was a surprise from the bride and groom, followed by a commemorative photo and first bite 💕

How about that? 💓

Or, instead of a bouquet toss, make it a bouquet pull ensuring that the friend's wife wins, and let the groom's broccoli bouquet pull also have the friend’s husband win, presenting them with a "this is a gift, thank you always 💕" message while taking a commemorative photo—it sounds wonderful 💓

After that, definitely have a genuine bouquet toss as well ❤️ (laugh)

【Response 6】

We had our friends fill out a marriage certificate two weeks before their wedding. (Since it was a civil ceremony)

Additionally, before the first bite, we had the sister-in-law’s family, who hadn’t had a wedding, do a mock first bite as senior couples.

Both were surprise announcements on the day (laugh)

【Response 7】

Surprise witness signing → Prepare a special vow for them and create a double wedding-like event!!

...How does that sound? (laugh)

【Response 8】

I think it would be wonderful to have the pastry chef prepare a small cake separately from the bridal couple’s wedding cake and also do a cake cutting and first bite!

【Response 9】

I heard from friends who haven’t had their wedding that at a banquet they attended, that friend couple performed a cake cutting!

They seemed to have known there would be a surprise production, but they were very surprised and delighted to find it was a cake cutting ☺️✨

【Response 10】

My parents didn’t have a wedding, so we did a cake cutting together!

It’s quite rare to see this together, so I recommend it! 💗

【Response 11】

✅ If it's a civil ceremony, you can have that couple come out and ask them the vow words, getting them to say "I promise!"

✅ You could also do something like bouquet tossing, suddenly handing the bouquet to the man who wants to surprise, and having him propose right there when the wife comes out!

【Response 12】

I have seen friends have vows during the ceremony!

【Response 13】

I think having them do a first bite is a good idea!

My cousin also had children before marriage, so they planned a wedding later, but eventually, they kept having kids, so they never had a wedding.

When the cousin’s sister got married, she surprisingly called my cousin and his wife to come up for the cake cutting and first bite!

It was a family matter, but relatives were very excited, and we were happy 😊

I can’t think of any great ideas, but I believe even a little thoughtfulness will be appreciated.

Negative Opinions Also Came In!

This consultation was asking, “What kind of idea would be good?” but it’s notable that many negative opinions like “Is that really necessary?” were collected.

Below are some of the negative opinions shared.

“Since it’s a relationship that makes them want to do something for their wedding, (in this case, actually relatives), they likely understand the other person's feelings ... but just to note, these opinions also exist.”

【Negative Response 1】

Depending on the reason for not having a wedding, it might be considered a burden…

But I think the happiest moment is wearing the dress, right? Trying on dresses was the most delightful part of my own wedding preparations 🥰

【Negative Response 2】

Were those two not able to have a wedding even if they wanted to...? If they simply didn’t want to, maybe they wouldn’t appreciate such a surprise either.

If they wanted to have a wedding but couldn’t, how about having them walk together during the outfit change?

【Negative Response 3】

A mock first bite might be just right for them!

Considering whether the couple would be happy to come to the front or not…

【Negative Response 4】

I would hate to be viewed as unfortunate for not having a wedding.

If I were brought in front of everyone and it became known that this couple hadn’t had a wedding, especially in an unfamiliar environment with many people, I would feel uncomfortable.

There might be reasons for not having a wedding as well…

【Negative Response 5】

The reason for not having a wedding matters, but to be honest, it feels like too much interference.

I would think it's a bit awkward to be suddenly the center of attention on someone else's special day.

If I knew all the guests well, it would be different, but I don’t want to be part of any production😱

【Negative Response 6】

This isn’t an idea per se, but I honestly wondered if the friends would want to be put in the spotlight like this on another’s wedding day.

If it were a family member, it would make sense, but friends, no matter how close, are still outsiders.

If they were brought into the spotlight on someone else's significant day, I would feel strange about it, especially with it being a surprise…

It might sound harsh, but if it goes wrong, others could view it as a wedding high…

If you really want to, it’s more courteous to confirm in advance.

【Negative Response 7】

This isn’t an idea, but personally, I wouldn’t want any surprises or being called out to be the center of attention on someone else’s wedding.

If the couple is fine with that, then it’s no problem.

【Negative Response 8】

The bride is the star, so adding elements related to the friend’s wedding might feel a bit off.

I would either do it at a second party or have the friend couple assist with the first bite of the cake…

The guests invited are there to celebrate the bride and groom, not to cheer on strangers....

So I feel it's better to hold back on making a big surprise for a friend’s wedding.

【Negative Response 9】

Firstly, if such a surprise were done at a wedding I was invited to, I wouldn't feel particularly happy 💦

【Negative Response 10】

I think it depends on the reason for not having a wedding 💦

If it’s a couple that wants to do something but hasn’t been able to, it could be a wonderful surprise!

【Negative Response 11】

If there’s a special reason for not having a wedding that was discussed, wouldn’t it make them feel bad if you surprised them according to your intentions?

I think they would appreciate a home wedding party on a different day.

【Negative Response 12】

I believe there are various reasons for not having a wedding.

While your thoughtfulness towards your friends is wonderful, it doesn't necessarily mean a surprise will make them happy.

I hope that the act of surprising doesn’t turn into self-satisfaction.

I myself, while I eventually moved towards having a wedding, was initially resistant to the idea, believing it’s fine not to do one.

I think there could be financial and environmental reasons, but also feelings of discomfort about being in front of others or feeling sorry for gathering people together.

If there are many unfamiliar faces among acquaintances at a friend's wedding where one is suddenly called up, I would feel extremely embarrassed and exposed.

Do you, the inquirer, consider that not having a wedding equals being unfortunate?

If the friend were positively open to your surprise suggestion, it would be different.

I believe that allowing the main couple to enjoy their day happily and enrichingly would leave all guests feeling happy as well, and is sufficient.

If I were to be treated as you suggested, I would feel uncomfortable, hence my added remarks.

Wishing for a Happy Wedding♡

This question gathered many negative opinions, but ultimately, it's impossible to fully understand another's feelings; we can only imagine or believe.

The strength of a relationship lies in how much we can confidently imagine or trust the feelings of others, and considering that, it’s okay if you think, “I believe this will make that person happy.”

(I know this might sound obvious!)

The idea that “this might be something that would please them” is certainly found in the earlier sections where everyone contributed your suggestions to find “I’m sure they would love this♡”, so please discover something precious and present it to your loved one♩