"Wedding Ceremonies My Friends in Their 30s Loved Attending!"

2020.05.17 published

The Wedding Fever Has Lifted, and We’re in Our 30s.

It's often said that there are usually two waves of weddings in one's 20s.

Around the age of 25 and again around 28.

During this short period, you might experience 80% of all the weddings you will attend in your life, as weddings seem to keep coming one after another for some reason.

Now, having gone through the entire wave of weddings, we are in our 30s.

Those who got married early while still young often have worries like, "I’ve never been to a wedding, and since no one else is getting married either, I have no idea how it goes,"

But on the other hand, those getting married in their 30s have different concerns. They may think, "Everyone must be bored of weddings since I've already been to so many," or "I feel embarrassed to ask everyone to come," or "Everyone else did this years ago, so it feels pointless to ask for advice now." It can be tough not to feel carefree about it.

Many people around me have mentioned, "Preparing for a wedding in my 30s was a real headache! It was challenging!"

<So!!!>

In this article, I will discuss what it’s like to plan a wedding when you’re over 30.

(Assuming that the friends you invite are also 30 and well-experienced in weddings)

What kind of wedding would not elicit worries like, "Oh, it’s just another typical wedding! I don’t want to go," (not to mention it’s quite rude for anyone to think that!!!) and how to prepare without those kinds of concerns.

I’ve gathered what my friends discussed when they said, "I would love to go to a wedding like this!"

If you’re a grown-up bride worried about how to impress guests, since a traditional, bubbly wedding might feel a bit too much for your age, I hope this can serve as a helpful reference.

① Famous Restaurants or Hotels

First and foremost, a wedding is about the food.

Now that guests are older and have experienced various restaurants, they might be unsatisfied with typical banquet food.

(In fact, it might even disappoint them...!)

The expectations and standards regarding food have certainly risen significantly from when they were younger.

To meet those expectations, a good solution is to hold the wedding at a restaurant that specializes in providing delicious food or a hotel known for its exquisite cuisine.

"Although it’s been a while, I still remember the wedding I attended at Maxim's de Paris, where the food was incredible! You could go to a 30,000 yen course dinner there, and it was almost miraculous that I could attend that wedding with just a 30,000 yen gift!"

A friend of mine still raves about the wedding they attended over five years ago.

In Tokyo, places like Joel Robuchon, Hiramatzu, Madame Taki, and Hôtel de Mikuni are excellent options.

Being invited to a wedding at a special restaurant makes the dining experience even more enjoyable♡

(It’s perfectly fine if someone else has the same venue!)

② Disney-themed Weddings

Moreover, contrary to high-end restaurants, there are surprisingly many voices expressing, "I want to attend a wedding at Disney Resort (Fairy Tale Weddings) 😂."

Something at Hotel Miracosta or Disney’s Grand Hotel, where Mickey or Minnie might appear!♡

I’ve never experienced that in my life and just want to see it at least once...!

If there are Disney-loving brides-to-be who are hesitant, thinking, "I’ve always dreamed of this, but I’m an adult now; it might be inappropriate for my age....?" I’d want to tell them, "I think there will be many guests who will be thrilled to participate!!"

@nagisa_marry

③ Be Home by Evening

Regarding the timing.

Many people in their 30s may have children, so scheduling the wedding so that guests can head home in the evening is a considerate aspect of hospitality.

Once you have a family, it's much tougher than when you were younger to stay out late for an after-party and not have to worry about the last train.... It can be quite a challenge.

(There are voices saying, "It’s a special occasion like a wedding; why not leave the kids with someone else?" but even within family, it can be touchy to ask for help.)

So, if possible, being home by the evening (so they can have dinner with their kids) or back home around bath time (by about 7 PM) makes it easier for guests who are married with children.

A suggestion of "Let’s have a moody night wedding since we’re all adults" is nice, but that’s a different consideration from being mindful of the participants.

④ Plenty of Conversation (Talking to People at the Same Table)

Once you are married with children, gathering everyone at the same time becomes quite challenging due to people's circumstances.

Having a wedding is a wonderful opportunity to meet (the beauty of ceremonial events ♡).

Since everyone hasn’t seen each other for a while, having a lot of time for conversations during the wedding makes guests feel more satisfied.

You don't need to worry about, "Is it okay if I don’t have any special performances prepared?"

Everyone is happy to gather for a wedding and delighted to engage in conversations.＊

(In fact, if there are too many performances resulting in a lack of conversations, it could lead to the event running late, which might inconvenience married guests with children.)

⑤ Fee-based Weddings

From the perspective of the burden of gift money, fee-based weddings are often more acceptable to guests.

Whether the ceremony takes place overseas or just with family, a fee structure of around 15,000 to 20,000 yen at a restaurant, without any gifts, is compact and popular.

Especially among brides-to-be over 30, it seems that having a ceremony abroad or at a shrine, then throwing a fee-based party, has become quite standard.＊

"Gifts vary in preference, and honestly, they aren’t necessary?"

"For catalog gifts, it’s a waste of handling fees; buying directly is more cost-effective."

This minimalist approach reflects a trend of cutting down on unnecessary waste.

(From an economic standpoint, the circulation amount decreases, so whether this is good or not is up to each individual!)

Did Any of These Resonate with You...???

Once you hit your 30s.

I’ve summarized what friends, who have attended numerous weddings and have also had their own, discussed: "But wouldn’t we be happy to attend a wedding like this?" or "This type can be a bit exhausting....!"

(However, evaluating and being picky about weddings like this seems mostly a notion for those in their early 30s; beyond that, many say things like "I don’t care how it is; I’m just glad to go to any weddings 😂.")

There are various opinions out there.

If you don't want to be influenced by others, don’t care about trends or the atmosphere, and don’t want to be considerate to others—if that’s you, just keep being yourself!

For those who are concerned, "What do other people think?" or "What do others feel about this??" I hope this article helps in choosing a wedding venue and planning the day without feeling too confined by others' opinions.