"Troubling Questions from the Photographer: Reflecting on 'Photos We Don't Want' at Weddings"
2021.01.17 published
What Photos Don't You Want?
Hello, I'm Nagisa from Marry.
The other day, during a meeting with the wedding photographer about the photos, I was asked, "What photos don't you want to be taken?"
I somewhat communicated that "I really don't like being photographed from below" and "I absolutely don't want close-up shots of just myself," but when asked, it's not easy to come up with immediate dislikes on the spot. (I thought I was quite particular, though!) So while looking through an album, my replies turned out to be rather vague, like “Hmm... maybe this one.....??”
It's easier to convey what photos I want to be taken, as I can clearly say “I want this!” However, if I only express what I want, there’s a possibility that it would limit the photographer's creativity, leading to a workflow-like shooting process. Considering this makes it quite a dilemma.
Therefore, I thought it would be better to communicate both “what photos I don’t want” and “the kind of photos I like” as two axes to guide the discussion when I got home.
In this article, I’ll share a list of "photos I don't want to be taken" that I would like to convey to the photographer when I meet them next.
<By the way, my preferences>
✅ I want "ordinary wedding photos" that won't look outdated after decades have passed.
✅ I prefer a calm atmosphere over a cute and peppy vibe.
✅ I'm not fond of photos that are stylized, like intentionally looking away.
✅ I’m not comfortable with being posed.
✅ My partner is not good with photos.
Photos I Want to Tell the Photographer Not to Take at the Wedding
✅ From below
Basically, the only people who look cute when photographed from below are those who are genuinely cute...
I wouldn’t want to be photographed from below, whether it’s close-up or full body.
✅ Back-to-back
Photos taken back-to-back generally appear "cool," "standing tall," and "both are gazing into the distance (or the bride is looking down)." I want to convey that I find this type of photo embarrassing.
✅ Leaning against a wall, hands in pockets
This is referring to photos of the groom.
I dislike unnatural photos that seem posed for the same reasons as back-to-back shots.
✅ Looking away
Photos where one deliberately looks away, glances, or looks down create an affected atmosphere; I'm not fond of them (both taking and viewing them are embarrassingly uncomfortable!).
✅ Extreme close-up
I don't have confidence in my face, and looking back at those photos later would likely make me feel uncomfortable, so I think these shouldn’t be taken.
✅ Proposal shot
While it is a classic photo, it feels a bit forced, and since my partner would also feel embarrassed, I want to convey that I don't want this from the outset.
✅ Jump shot
Since I’m not particularly a "lively!" person, it takes time to set up for these shots. If there’s time to jump, I’d prefer to take normal photos instead.
✅ Holding props
Generally, props for the shoot come and go with trends, so I don't need photos with props other than the bouquet.
(I think it might be good to shoot with preferred props during pre-wedding photos when there's plenty of time, though.)
✅ Fake preparation shots
I’m not fond of artificial preparation photos like "the groom putting on a jacket" or "putting on cufflinks." (My partner also said, "I don’t want to take this.")
✅ Solo shots
I don’t particularly need solo photos either. I especially don’t want to pressure my partner, who is not good with photos.
Share What Photos You Don't Want with the Photographer!
If the shooting time were limitless, I could later decide "I don't want this photo" from the options, but wedding time is limited.
Fundamentally, I don't want to waste precious shooting time or cuts on photos I don't want, right?
(So, I thought it was very kind of the photographer who asked what photos I didn’t want during our meeting.)
If you have any requests regarding "the kind of photos you do not want to be taken," it’s a good idea to communicate them to the photographer in advance.