Is It Safer to Avoid Friend Involvement During the Pandemic? What Should You Do About Roles Like Welcoming Guests or Friend Speeches?

2020.08.21 published

Until Now, I Would Have Asked...

At weddings so far,

✅ Reception duties

✅ Entertainment

✅ Friend speeches

✅ Escorting during intermission

✅ Second party organizer

✅ Bridesmaid

There have been many tasks and performances that we've asked friends to do.

@himawari___wedding

<Especially during this time> It's hard to ask friends for help...

But...

In this time of COVID-19, asking friends for help can become a source of concern for both parties.

Even if you really want to ask for help, you might think, "What if they want to decline because they want to RSVP as 'not attending'?"

Even if they are willing to help, there could be a possibility that their family might say, "You cannot go to the wedding..."

Unfortunately, during this nervous time caused by COVID-19, it might be better to avoid assigning tasks to friends as much as possible and to enjoy the wedding in a more passive manner for everyone's comfort.

But.

So, what should we do about the tasks and performances that would originally have been requested from friends?

① Reception Duties

If you are not asking a friend for reception duties, it seems best to ask siblings or cousins.

Alternatively, to avoid the risks of having multiple people face-to-face at the reception, you could consider an unmanned reception or even forgoing it entirely.

Recently, there are services that allow online receptions (with cash gifts being paid online in advance!) and demand for these is likely to grow.

➡ Services to skip the reception or make cash gifts cashless＊

@chercher_ay

② Entertainment

Asking friends for entertainment is also an aspect to avoid.

On the day, some might feel uneasy about performing a dance or skit, and even if they create a video, they would need to gather and travel beforehand.

(More than the risk itself, it might make you worry if they feel burdened by such a request.)

Nowadays, about half of brides and grooms choose not to have any entertainment♡ It's completely natural to do so, so rest easy.

In fact, it might be appreciated as a thoughtful consideration for COVID-19.

If you choose to go without entertainment, a common alternative is to take time for table rounds, but if you want to avoid moving during dining,

✅ Show a thank-you video from the bride and groom to guests

✅ First dance by the bride and groom (♡)

✅ Games like bingo, a lottery, or rock-paper-scissors that can be done while seated

✅ Include an introduction of the menu by the chef

✅ Increase outfit changes or shift to traditional attire

How about incorporating these ideas?＊

③ Friend Speeches

Those asked to give speeches might feel anxious about being unable to decline due to feelings of obligation, so this is something to avoid as well.

(It's sad to make someone feel conflicted about wanting to skip but feeling obliged to give a speech...)

You might consider eliminating speeches altogether, or alternatively, asking for a speech from family members like grandparents or siblings.

@nagisa_marry

④ Escorting During Intermission

Like friend speeches, it becomes difficult for those asked to escort during intermission to decline attending, so it's best to avoid making requests in advance.

If it's a surprise, there’s a chance that the guest might not be able to attend, so it's wise to think of alternative candidates just in case.

@yuih_wd

⑤ Second Party Organizer

Organizing a second party requires advance meetings and direct communication on the day, so it's best to avoid asking for this role.

(Even outside of this time, there’s a trend of avoiding asking friends due to the burdensome nature of organizing a second party.)

It's convenient to have a "second party agent" handle everything so you can delegate entirely!＊

⑥ Bridesmaids/Groomsmen

Similarly, asking for bridesmaids or groomsmen roles in advance is also something best avoided.

Instead, you could provide matching items like flower hairpins or wristlets for all female guests and boutonnieres or bowties for all male guests to create a sense of unity.＊

If you absolutely want to take pictures with bridesmaids, consider hiring a pre-wedding shoot plan to allow ample time for fun photo sessions! ♡

Allow Friends to Freely Choose to Attend or Not Attend the Wedding.

Because you want to ask your important friends to take on key roles at the wedding.

When they feel the desire to decline attending, removing barriers so they can communicate their decision to the bride and groom without conflict might be a form of kindness.

What do you all think?

➡ List of articles related to the coronavirus