"Speaking Honestly: Essential Purchases to Enhance Your Married Life and Regrets of Things Bought"

2021.03.10 published

Reflecting on 4 Years of Marriage

Four years of marriage.

Recently, while discussing with my husband about the things we’ve bought as a family that were good and those that weren't, I found it quite interesting.

People’s regrets can be valuable lessons, and I thought, “Shouldn’t this be shared with newlyweds?” So I decided to share it in this article.

If you have things you're planning to buy or set up in your new married life, I hope you can see it from a different perspective!

@haruno45

Regrets about Item ① Semi-double Bed

For a while after getting married, we were sleeping together on a single bed that I had since I was single.

After some time, we moved to a more spacious home and decided to buy a new bed. However, accustomed to the cramped feeling of the single bed, I thought, “We are just two people, so a semi-double should be enough.”

A semi-double bed is fine for just two people, but now that we have a child, it’s too narrow to use.

I knew that most people were buying queen or king sizes, but as someone who had been sleeping on a single bed, that felt irrelevant to me, too extravagant, and I questioned whether it really made sense to buy such a large bed. I want to go back in time and slap myself for that...

Beds are quite expensive, with the mattress and frame costing a lot, and disposing of it also costs money, plus not having a comfortable bed affects the quality of life...

I regret not ignoring my thoughts and just buying a queen size like everyone else...

Recently, I bought a bed for my younger brother as a wedding gift. He initially said he wanted a double size, but taking my reflections into account, I convinced him to go for a queen size instead!

I envy him for having one that will last a long time.

Regrets about Item ② Dishwasher

We live in a rental apartment that doesn’t have a built-in dishwasher, so at my husband’s request, we bought a household dishwasher.

It was a highly rated tabletop dishwasher from Sharp, which was trending online.

At the time, it could be installed in our house, and my husband was very pleased. But before a year had passed, we moved, and the new house couldn’t accommodate that tabletop dishwasher.

As a result, the dishwasher became unusable...

It cost about 50,000 yen, so compared to the bed, it wasn’t as shocking, but losing something that cost 50,000 yen so quickly was still a normal shock...

When considering buying an additional dishwasher while living in a rental apartment, I suggest calculating whether or not you plan to move again, and when, before making the purchase...

It was a waste to just throw it away, so I ended up keeping the useless metal lump in my closet for about a year until I finally took it to a recycling shop.

It was heavy and difficult to transport...

Regrets about Item ③ 45L Trash Can

When we moved, I thought I had to get various new household items and eagerly bought a trash can set (for combustible waste, non-combustible waste, and separate bins for empty bottles and cans).

But upon further reflection, it would have been more hygienic to throw away trash before it accumulated to 45L...

It smells, and 45L is quite large (it’s about the size you would find in an office). In a two-person household, the garbage doesn’t accumulate that much, and I would prefer to throw away food waste daily... so in the end, the 45L trash can set was unnecessary for me.

It was also a hassle to reserve for bulky waste disposal, so I paid a handy service to take it away...

Things That Are Worth Buying

① Nitori’s Tempura Oil Pot

...This product dramatically lowered the threshold for frying and changed my life.

To be honest, I had hardly ever fried things at home, but a friend tweeted, “After buying this, frying has become so easy!” So I felt encouraged to get one, and it was exactly as they said.

I can return the oil I used right back into the pot, and it filters and cleans the returned oil, allowing me to fry vegetables easily in ample oil.

I can now casually make dishes like fried chicken or tonkatsu, which I never made at home before, and frying vegetables has become a breeze. If you think “frying is a waste of oil...,” I highly recommend it! Fried food is genuinely delicious...

② Bread Knife

...Sometimes when I bought bread, I found it annoying to cut it with a regular knife instead of a proper bread knife, feeling like an inadequate bachelor.

When I didn’t have a bread knife, I felt downcast when cutting delicious bread with a regular knife, but once I started cutting bread with the proper knife, that frustration was resolved.

Also, I want a knife for cutting cakes. I cannot stand the sound of knives hitting plates...

It’s not really urgent, so I tended to hold back from purchasing it, but I realized these kinds of things can actually change the quality of life... Everything was available at my parents' house from the start, and I now appreciate how amazing my family home was...

③ Butter Knife

...For me, not having a butter knife led to feelings of dissatisfaction in my life.

You can certainly use knives, spoons, or forks to substitute, and I did so before buying a butter knife (even though I disliked it), but I now think that was similar to saying, “Let’s just eat with our hands since we don’t have chopsticks!”

(Looking back, both the butter knife and bread knife seem like essential items. I wonder why I even thought to use substitutes...)

“Having the right tools” and “not having to make substitutions” are crucial points where I don’t feel guilty in my life; rather, they bring me joy. I’ve come to realize that. Does anyone else feel the same way?

④ Hand Truck

...A hand truck is something quite practical, far removed from the richness of life.

Living in an apartment and using a car can be quite challenging when doing big shopping; you need a hand truck to carry a lot of items up from the parking lot in the basement to our apartment.

After moving to an apartment and seeing others use one, I bought it right away.

Conclusion: Be Cautious with Expensive and Bulky Purchases!

I listed down the things I consider personal failures after getting married and those I’m truly satisfied with.

Looking at this list, the shock from “expensive items and bulky items that ended up being useless” was indeed quite significant.

Additionally, while I don’t feel that Roombas or dishwashers significantly improve my quality of life, smaller items like butter knives or bread knives do seem to enhance my happiness...

How do you wish to spend your money when you consider it in light of your lifestyle, values, and personality?

Discussing this with your partner could be interesting, so give it a try ♡

And when making big purchases, please be cautious...!

@haruno45