"Getting Creative: Ways to Shine a Spotlight on Grandparents at Weddings Beyond the Exit!"

2021.05.06 published

I Love My Grandparents ♡

Introducing the concerns received at marry.

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I would like to create an opportunity for my grandparents to participate in the wedding reception.

After much consideration, I decided to go for the exit with my siblings for the outfit change.

Therefore, if you have any good ideas or experiences aside from the exit for the outfit change, please share them with me.

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Here are all the advice and responses collected from everyone＊

[Response 1]

We initially didn’t plan to have a wedding, but when we went to report our marriage to our grandparents, they were very happy.

My grandfather said, "Please have a wedding!" I didn't plan to, but as I began to think that it might be filial piety to my grandparents and parents, I started to get excited and ultimately decided to have the wedding.

So, I asked my grandfather to give a toast!! It’s common for bosses or friends to do it, but he gladly accepted it (^^)

While I asked my grandfather, I think it would be wonderful to ask both grandparents together.

At the Grammy Awards or Academy Awards, presenters sometimes appear together, so I don’t think it’s strange at all (^^)

[Response 2]

How about handing over a present and taking a picture with everyone when you exit with your siblings?

[Response 3]

For a customer I worked with, I suggested a surprise where it looked like they were exiting with only their siblings, but instead, they welcomed their grandparents and exited together.

Additionally, you could incorporate a symbolic bite where the grandparents get to showcase their skills 😊

[Response 4]

✅ Before the first bite, have my grandparents feed each other cake as a 'thank you' bite.

✅ During the re-entry after the outfit change, have the groom enter first a little ahead, then have the bride hold hands with her grandparents and bring her to the groom.

✅ At the re-entry after the outfit change, stop by the seats of the grandparents to give a gift and express gratitude from the bride.

💞 May it be a wonderful ceremony 💞

[Response 5]

I surprised my grandparents with a bouquet before handing one to my parents toward the end of the reception!

For me, they were the two who raised me more than my parents, so I really wanted to include something for my grandparents, and I attached a letter to the bouquet to express my gratitude ☺️

[Response 6]

How about a surprise interview? 😌😌

Sharing childhood stories or congratulatory messages could be lovely too 😌😌

[Response 7]

We created a scene at the reception where the bride served beer to the guests.

For the first and second cups, I poured for my grandfather (and grandmother) who loves beer.

[Response 8]

Symbolic bite! Or thank you bite!

[Response 9]

I did a thank you bite! I wanted to express my gratitude to my grandmother who raised me while my parents worked. She seemed a bit shy but was very delighted!

If it’s the same for the grandfather, having the groom’s side nominate two may be nice, while the bride’s side could also involve both grandparents.

[Response 10]

It was a family wedding, but I did a thank you bite with all relatives, kind of like serving drinks around.

I made sure to scoop the cake in smaller bites to be respectful to the elderly.

[Response 11]

I have never seen a thank you bite for grandparents, that could be nice ☺️

[Response 12]

How about a surprise bite?

[Response 13]

I used to handle the sound for receptions.

An unexpected popular performance was to pass by the grandparents' seats during re-entry, handing out gifts and so on; it seemed to flow naturally.

[Response 14]

Doing thank you bites or symbolic bites or having the grandparents act as ring bearers is also a novel and heartwarming idea!

[Response 15]

How about a symbolic bite or a thank you bite before the first bite!

[Response 16]

Some people give presents during the table rounds after re-entering for the outfit change 🐑🐑 I hope you have a wonderful day 💓💓

[Response 17]

How about having both grandfather and grandmother do a symbolic bite? 🤭💕

[Response 18]

I work on-site!

It’s common to request photos with grandparents during the break; if you stop by their seats when it's smoother, that saves time 😊

[Response 19]

I only have my maternal grandmother who will turn 77 this year.

My birthday is about two months different from the wedding date, but I plan to make a purple kimono and celebrate her 77th birthday after gifting it to my parents.

My husband’s grandparents have all passed away, so my grandmother is the only guest from that side.

[Response 20]

How about having them carry the wedding cake?

[Response 21]

I asked both of our grandmothers to sign the wedding certificate at the ceremony (^^)

[Response 22]

During a friend's wedding, I thought it was wonderful when the grandparents walked down the aisle carrying the rings.

[Response 23]

How about having the grandparents do a symbolic bite before the first bite of the wedding cake?

It's common for the parents to demonstrate, so...

[Response 24]

At a wedding I attended, I saw the bride and groom do a thank you bite for their grandparents!

At that moment, both sets of grandparents were at the front, totaling six people!

I thought it was a unique performance, but it didn’t seem beautiful since the grandparents were "ahh-ing," feeling somewhat like a caregiving atmosphere, which didn’t come across as happy to me.

However, I can see why some might describe it as “heartwarming!"

[Response 25]

I just graduated from being a bride not long ago.

I exited with my grandfather and sister during the outfit change. I called my sister first as a surprise, then called my grandfather to exit together.

Later during the reception, we had a lottery, and coincidentally, my grandfather won. He got quite a bit of attention during the interview and was moved to tears seeing me in my wedding attire.

If there's time during the reception, I thought it would be nice to express gratitude with a surprise gift like flowers or a keepsake. Or, when exiting with my siblings, we could go together to the grandparents’ seats and give them something.

Grandparents would be thrilled simply to see their grandchild on a special day, so I believe they would appreciate any expression of kindness!

[Response 26]

After much consideration, I nominated my grandparents for the exit.

[Response 27]

I also wanted to exit with my grandparents, but given the circumstances of the pandemic, I felt it might be anxiety-inducing for them, so I changed to leave with my siblings 🙏🏻

However, it's hard to take photos with grandparents on the wedding day, whether during the pandemic or not... 🥲

The planner suggested that during our free time before the break, we could arrange to go to each other’s grandparents' seats for photos together ☺️🌷

On the day of, my grandparents were watching from the back of the venue and got to take photos; they were so happy that I felt it was definitely worth doing 🌻

[Response 28]

Not at the reception, but I had a first meet with my grandparents!

[Response 29]

I did a first bite with my grandfather! He was incredibly happy!

[Response 30]

I think a thank you bite would be great.

[Response 31]

I wanted to take photos at the grandparents' seats before the exit of the outfit change, but I decided not to have a reception 🥺

[Response 32]

Symbolic bite!

[Response 33]

I exited the ceremony with my older brother and sister, but during the exit, I went to my grandparents' seats to present them with a letter of gratitude 🌹✨

[Response 34]

During the first bite, how about having my grandparents show me how it’s done as life mentors? 😊

[Response 35]

I'm the venue captain.

If there are performances like photo rounds or candle services, giving commemorative gifts then would be good too.

Also, if the grandparents have any special skills, it might be nice to give them a chance to demonstrate!

(For example, if they are good at poem recitation or calligraphy, exhibiting something as welcome goods would work well.)

Additionally, if they grow any vegetables or fruits, it could be nice to include those in special menus.

(Confirmation with the planner would be needed)

[Response 36]

Unfortunately, as my grandfather has passed away, I cannot suggest anything, but I asked my grandmother for the last bite.

[Response 37]

I’m both a planner and a bride, so I hope to be helpful and I’ll send many points in list form♡

✅ A surprise bite.

After the cake cutting, how about a surprise where I feed my grandparents a piece of cake as a thank you gesture?

It would be even nicer if the spoon used to feed them was a special one made to wish for their longevity!

✅ A surprise plate could also be great.

How about writing a message to my grandparents on a plate when serving dessert, so the newlyweds deliver it with their heartfelt feelings?

✅ Writing a concluding letter or thanking them in words would also be wonderful.

✅ Presenting commemorative gifts with a bouquet.

When presenting the bouquet, after handing one to the parents, the hosts can prompt, "Actually, we have someone else we want to thank..." and go to the grandparents' seat to give them a small gift bouquet.

✅ Taking longer for friendly chats! Go take pictures!

You must definitely talk to and take photos with your grandparents! If time runs short on the day and you can’t do it, you will really regret it later 😭

✅ A first meet.

Having a first meet with both grandparents would be lovely! Just a performance that can’t be done in front of other guests!

✅ Delivering gifts to the grandparents.

Let the staff know your grandparents' favorite drinks or a memorable food your grandmother used to make, and have it provided on the day with a comment from the host together with the memory!

I hope you can convey your feelings to your grandparents so that there will be no regrets!

[Response 38]

How about having the cake carried over? ☺️

Or having the grandparents do a symbolic bite? 😏

[Response 39]

During the ceremony, I have both of my grandparents help me with preparations!

Bride's mother → Veil down

Both grandparents → Putting on gloves

By the way, the groom's mother does the tie, and the groom's grandparents help with the boutonniere etc. ❣️

[Response 40]

If it’s to include grandparents, how about this?

At the timing of the cake cutting, have a small whole cake brought to the grandparents to perform the cutting as an example.

Of course, we should request both sets of grandparents, and it feels warmer to do it surrounded by family in the relatives' seats than with moving to the main table.

Since doing it simultaneously for both families might create a challenge for photo opportunities, I think it is better to do it in order, starting with the groom's side, then the bride's side.

[Response 41]

Not during the reception, but...

I asked my grandfather to pour the sacred sake during the "San-San-Kudo" ceremony!

Then, to my surprise, there was a bouquet presentation from my grandparents during the reception 🥲💕

[Response 42]

Congratulations on your marriage! 😌♡ How about a thank you bite? I think it will create a warm atmosphere 🎂

[Response 43]

How about a thank you bite where they come out? ☺️✨ We didn’t have a reception, but after our first meet before the ceremony, we held a family meet!

My parents and grandparents were present, so they appeared in the end credits, and I’m glad we did it 🥰

[Response 44]

How about a thank you bite?

I think it's the cutest to have the grandparents feed each other cake 🥰 By the way, I did this at my wedding too ♥️

[Response 45]

Hello! I once saw a performance on TikTok where both grandfathers surprised the couple by carrying the wedding cake!

After that, I believe they did a thank you bite with the grandfathers...! I’m not sure if it’s possible during the pandemic, but I thought it was wonderful ☺️🤍

Also, I’ve thought about having the ring pillow carried during the ceremony.

While it’s often done by small children, I think that pattern from grandparents would work as well ☺️

[Response 46]

Have them carry the cake 🎂

[Response 47]

Or have them bring in the cake!

[Response 48]

I’m struggling with this too! I initially considered leaving during the break, but the pandemic led to a change in the flow of the ceremony, so I modified my plan.

My idea was to shine the spotlight on grandparents through interviews suggested by the planner! ☺️

[Response 49]

I decided to exit the outfit change with my grandmother, while my husband will exit with his siblings.

However, since I would be the only one welcoming one grandmother, I thought it would be rude not to prepare a gift for the other grandmother as well, so I prepared gifts for both grandmothers.

I presented my gift during the outfit change, while my husband went to his grandmother's seats with his siblings and presented a gift.

So how about preparing small gifts for the grandparents during the exit with your siblings as well?

[Response 50]

How about having the grandparents participate during the thank you bite?

I hope they feel appreciated!＊

There’s no hierarchy among guests, but...

Weddings often seat the closest family members far away, which can feel a bit lonely for both parties.

I believe grandparents would be genuinely happy just to see their grandchildren’s joyful moments, but having something special prepared would surely create even more memorable memories ♡

Thank you to everyone who responded! ♡

@nagisa_marry