Proposing with Wedding Rings: The Trendy Choice 💭 [Is It Exciting to Receive One? Or Should You Choose Your Own?]

2024.12.02 published

Engagement Ring as a Symbol of Engagement 💍

The engagement ring is given as a symbol of engagement and a promise of marriage at the time of the proposal.

The origin of the engagement ring is said to date back to ancient Rome, where men would give women iron rings as a sign of marriage.

Later, during the Middle Ages in Europe, a custom emerged where nobles would give rings as a symbol of engagement.

The practice of adorning engagement rings with diamonds began around the 15th century.

A diamond engagement ring was gifted when Maximilian I of the Habsburg dynasty (who later became the Holy Roman Emperor) got engaged to Marie, the daughter of Duke Charles the Bold of Burgundy.

This is considered to be the first diamond engagement ring in history, and afterwards, giving diamond rings became a part of royal wedding ceremonies.

Although it is less common now, in the 1970s, De Beers, a major diamond company, advertised that “an engagement ring should be worth three months’ salary,” making giving expensive diamond rings the norm in Japan as well.

Giving an expensive diamond engagement ring is said to signify:

🔸 The man's financial stability

🔸 It can be liquidated in case of emergencies

(such as financial difficulties or in the event of a divorce)

In today's society, where dual-income households are the norm and marriages are based on mutual support rather than relying solely on the man, some might think that giving engagement rings does not suit them.

The Perspective that Engagement Rings are Unnecessary

There is a somewhat outdated connotation surrounding engagement rings.

Recently, more couples are choosing not to receive or give engagement rings based on practical considerations, such as:

✅ They don’t wear them, so it feels wasteful

✅ They want to use the money on their honeymoon or new life together

Some choose to commemorate their engagement with items like necklaces or bracelets that can be worn regularly.

There are various perspectives on this, so it’s best to find a form that both partners are satisfied with.

That being said, I think there are those who feel that while they don’t need an engagement ring, they still want a "box pop" proposal!

The Option to Propose with Wedding Rings Instead of Engagement Rings

Proposing with wedding rings instead of engagement rings is rare, but I think it’s a lovely perspective.

I have seen people propose with wedding rings sporadically (like when I scroll through Instagram to see brides’ posts, it feels like I see it every couple of years).

Recently, Kaho-chan, a cast member from ABEMA TV’s "Goodbye Proposal" (a popular Instagrammer and model for Bihaku Hyakka), received a surprise wedding ring from her boyfriend, Shuhei-kun, during the show when they got together.

(By the way, Shuhei-kun gave her an engagement bracelet at the time of the proposal. He mentioned that he had planned to give her the wedding ring then, but couldn’t at that moment.)

What Do Everyone's Opinions Say?

I was curious about everyone's opinions on whether they would be happy to receive a wedding ring instead of an engagement ring, so I conducted a survey among marry’s followers on Instagram!

Out of 900 responses:

🔸 52% thought it was a good idea!

🔸 41% replied that they wouldn’t be happy about it.

The majority leaned towards it being a good idea.

Six percent reported they have heard of this before. The vast majority have not!

Next, I gathered realistic opinions on how they would feel if they were proposed to with a wedding ring instead of an engagement ring.

Response 1

I was proposed to with a wedding ring!

As a nurse, there are times when I can’t wear an engagement ring, so I remember discussing that we’d rather spend that money on our honeymoon. He surprised me with a wedding ring instead of an engagement ring.

I thought there wouldn’t be a “box pop” proposal since there was no engagement ring, but secretly I had also hoped for one, so I was really happy when he chose the wedding ring and presented it to me on his knee!

Response 2

This is the first time I’ve heard of that pattern!

In the moment, I think I’d feel genuinely happy.

However, later on, I might feel a bit unsettled thinking I would have liked to choose together!

Response 3

Since I’m among those who don’t need an engagement ring, I would be happy to receive a wedding ring as a surprise!

The thought that he put in effort to choose something I would wear every day would truly make me happy.

Response 4

I think proposing with a wedding ring is wonderful!

Response 5

I’d be happy he proposed, but I want to choose the wedding ring myself.

If I could wish for more, I’d like an engagement ring too!

I received a diamond necklace instead of an engagement ring at the time of my proposal.

Response 6

I’m surprised since I haven’t heard of this before, and I’d feel I wanted to choose the wedding ring since I’d wear it every day.

If it were a surprise wedding ring, I’d prefer we simply go shopping for wedding rings together instead.

Response 7

Because it’s a ring I’ll wear for life, I want to choose a design I like!

If he remembers a conversation we had about a specific ring and surprises me with it, I would be incredibly happy!

Response 8

It’s been 7 years of marriage.

We went ring shopping together after a no-ring proposal.

I declined an engagement ring.

From my perspective, I think proposing with a wedding ring is acceptable.

Given the circumstances, buying a ring is tough.

Depending on the relationship, simply being proposed to brings joy, so I believe I would still be happy to receive a ring.

Though I might think, “I actually wanted a different design…”, if it’s a ring chosen by my beloved partner, I can cherish it.

Response 9

I might momentarily wonder why there wasn’t an engagement ring, but I think I’d be happy!

Response 10

I dislike the implications behind engagement rings, like in traditional contexts where they signify "I’ll take care of you for life," so I find wedding rings to be sufficient.

I’ll be happy if he surprises me by choosing it!

Response 11

I want to choose for myself! Due to my job, I can’t wear rings and can only wear them on my days off, so I want something I truly like! In fact, I chose my engagement ring myself.

Coincidentally, one day I was at a café thinking it might be nice to get married when I overheard women beside me talk about how they received engagement rings that weren’t to their liking or how glad they were for choosing their own. I shared this story with my then-boyfriend (now husband) and told him I wanted to choose for myself when the time came! I mentioned a ring I was interested in!

I received a bouquet during the proposal and later went ring shopping for the engagement and wedding rings together, leaving the diamond size and quality to him while I stepped away for a bit!

Response 12

If he really knows my taste perfectly, that would be great, but honestly, I want to choose for myself!

I chose mine myself and believe that was the right choice!

There are so many things you can’t know without trying them on!

Response 13

My best friend received a surprise wedding ring! She said every time she wears it, she remembers being proposed to, and I thought that was wonderful!

Response 14

Since I’ll wear the wedding ring for life, I want to choose it together.

If due to financial issues, we didn’t buy an engagement ring but got a wedding ring, I’d prefer a bouquet or a letter instead of an engagement ring.

Response 15

I dislike it even when it comes to an engagement ring being chosen for me! I made it clear from the start…

I was informed that there’s also a method to buy the diamond first and then make it into a ring later! So, the proposal could be with a diamond and then go ring shopping together later, creating either an engagement or wedding ring!

Response 16

I want to choose for myself! Due to my job, I can’t wear rings, and I only wear them on days off, so I want something I truly love! I actually chose my engagement ring!

One day, while at a café, I overheard women saying they received engagement rings that were subpar or that they were glad they chose for themselves.

I shared this with my then-boyfriend (now husband) and expressed that when the time came, I wanted to choose for myself, mentioning a specific ring I liked!

During the proposal, I received flowers, and we later went to a jewelry store together to choose our engagement and wedding rings.

Response 17

I love surprises, so having a wedding ring as a surprise sounds wonderful!!!

Unincluded Responses

It's a bit sad

I want to choose for myself.

I think I’d prefer to choose my wedding ring.

I might feel it’s a bit much for him to choose the wedding ring.

I’d definitely prefer to choose the wedding ring myself since I’ll wear it for life.

While my couple made custom rings together, I’d prefer to choose one.

In the 20s, I might not mind, but by my late 30s, I want to consider my own preferences and ease of wear for work, and would like to choose for myself, possibly different designs from the same brand.

I want to choose the ring’s design. I’d feel disappointed if an unfortunate feeling emerges from what should be a joyful proposal, so I hope he doesn’t.

Proposing with a Wedding Ring 💍

Traditionally, surprise proposals or using a surprise engagement ring to later choose wedding rings together are mainstream, but more than half support proposals with wedding rings as well!

Most responses against it were mainly expressing the desire to choose for themselves.

If the girlfriend's preferences are known or there are no strong preferences, giving a wedding ring as a surprise fits the current values, and perhaps it might even become more common in the future...

Related Articles

➡Discussed on X: Is it bad not to buy an engagement ring and split the wedding ring?

➡An option other than rings or necklaces! A feature on “engagement bracelets” that you’d want to have.

➡Only quality items that can be worn for a lifetime ♡ A feature on brand necklaces that can be considered “engagement necklaces.”

➡Getting married, as a couple talked it out. A story about the recipient of the proposal and the thoughts behind it.

➡Are there some that can be purchased for under 100,000 yen? Do you know the cheapest high-end wedding rings?

➡Who buys the rings? The husband or both? How do you think is normal when it comes to spending for wedding rings?