"Balancing Perception and Budget: Considering the Level of Catering for Your Wedding"

2022.04.13 published

殿堂記事

The Biggest Concern?! The Rank of Wedding Menu.

The price and rank of the meal courses served to guests at wedding receptions have always been a source of worry for hosts since the concept of weddings began in ancient times.

In the past, parents used to be the hosts, but now it’s increasingly common for the bride and groom to take on this role, which poses a painful dilemma for the younger generation, who must make decisions involving hundreds of thousands of yen, an amount that can be startling.

It’s difficult because various ideals and realities intersect.

☑ It’s admirable to want to treat guests to gourmet meals.

☑ However, money is not limitless, and the contributions from guests are finite, not to mention that the couple doesn’t want to rely on those contributions.

☑ They want to set a budget that fits within their means.

☑ But they don’t want to be perceived as stingy, and they also want to enjoy delicious food themselves.

Because of these conflicting feelings among various brides-to-be, deciding on the meal course is supposed to be a fun but truly challenging task.

It would be great to taste all the dishes side by side, but even that incurs costs, and since the basic courses are already set, requests like “I want to change this dish!” are often difficult to accommodate.

Do guests really think, 'Wow, they cheaped out on the food'?

The root of the anxiety about the rank of wedding catering centers on a singular thought: "I want to lower the rank, but is it okay...?"

Couples who upgrade the meal rank don’t usually seem to dwell on what to do with the food too deeply. They decisively plan, “Let’s go with the highest rank for the guests’ meal!” and then might think, “But maybe this isn’t necessary,” or “I’d like to change this menu item.”

In reality, when speaking with planners or venue staff, many individuals who decide to set a higher rank for the food have already made that decision beforehand, resulting in shorter deliberation time.

Conversely, those looking to lower the rank often experience a myriad of conflicting considerations and feelings, leading to indecisiveness: “What should I do...? Is this really okay...?”

However, that’s pretty normal!

Those who can allocate more budget to the food can do as they please without worries, but those with constraints are naturally going to face more doubts, thoughts, and creativity.

But please think very carefully. The reason you might be worried about “Is it okay to lower the rank?” is likely because you don’t want guests to think, “Oh, this wedding is cheap.”

But do guests really think like that?!

Speaking personally, in all the weddings I have attended, I have never once felt that way!

Ultimately, what guests hope for in a wedding is not just delicious food, but the chance to celebrate the happiness of the bride and groom.

If there is anyone who thinks, “They cheaped out on the food,” can you really maintain a good relationship with that kind of person for life?!

Without worrying about such thoughts, you should invite guests who will genuinely say, “That was a wonderful wedding. Congratulations on your marriage.”

And if the food rank is low or high, those who complain will find something to complain about, no matter the circumstance.

Not just “They cheaped out,” but also other reasons like

“It wasn’t tasty,”

“I didn’t like it,”

“It was cold,”

“The serving service was poor,”

will likely come up in negative feedback that the bride and groom can’t control in many cases.

So I believe there’s no need to worry about the rank of the food! Just set it in a way that fits within the budget and is manageable.

It’s best not to pay attention to the opinions of those who will say this or that! The couple should choose a plan they feel “satisfied with this after considering various conditions.”

If you really care about others’ opinions, choose a higher plan.

If you’re truly worried and want to avoid negative comments at all costs, the best risk hedge you can find is to solve it financially.

Since the rank of the food is something the couple can control, determining not to lower the rank will prevent guests from making negative comments about costs (and also enables the couple to confidently say, if such comments are made, that “that’s not true.”)

*However, in many cases, whether the food is good or not doesn't depend on the high cost of the ingredients, but rather on the chef’s skills, cooking methods, and presentation.

(Even with a top rank plan, if the food isn’t good, it probably won’t be tasty!)

But what kind of food makes guests think, 'They cheaped out'?

Standing on the premise of good faith, “No guest will complain at someone else’s wedding!” is nice to think, but it’s a fact that if you search, you’ll find a lot of people who express dissatisfaction with wedding food.

It’s best not to pay attention to such opinions, but it might be useful to know the general judgment criteria.

Knowing what kinds of dishes are considered expensive and what kinds are seen as cheap is beneficial.

High-end dishes and ingredients

Yukone as a side dish

Carpaccio as an appetizer

Uncommon vegetables like Romanesco as a side dish

Foie gras

Topped with caviar

Topped with truffle

Lobster as an appetizer or main dish

Ise lobster as an appetizer or main dish

Main fish dishes such as red snapper or sea bream

Premium meat like Wagyu beef or A5 grade

Flambé dessert

Topped with gold leaf

Soup is bisque

Cheap dishes and ingredients

Common side dishes such as carrots and potatoes

Duck as the main meat dish

Pork as the main meat dish

Chicken as the main meat dish

Sea bass as the main fish dish

Salmon as the main fish dish

No palate cleanser

Regular sorbet dessert

One type of bread

Corn soup, minestrone, clam chowder, consomme soup

After asking around, this is what I found out.

From my friends, this is the general response I got. I asked them to focus on whether they think the ingredients are expensive or cheap, not whether they like it or if it’s good.

Therefore, irrespective of preferences or taste, this is what I got when I asked them to share their perceptions of the rank of the ingredients themselves! Just

“Salmon may seem cheap, but it’s tasty, so I like it.”

“Onion soup and clam chowder can easily be made at home, so it feels a bit cheap, but they are delicious.”

“I’ve never had a palate cleanser! I didn’t even notice.”

Many voices supported the idea that deliciousness, rather than the ingredients' elegance or rank, is the most crucial point, and I did not hear a single opinion that wedding food was considered tasty but not good.

(Ultimately, the wedding venue's priority is on hospitality. They should be making every effort to provide delicious food, so you should feel at ease.)

What about concerns regarding the quantity being insufficient?

Wedding food is professional quality. No matter what course you choose, it should be delicious!

However, those opting for lower ranks sometimes worry, “Will there be enough quantity...?” but those worries are unnecessary.

After all, wedding meals can cost around ten thousand yen even at the low end.

I doubt there will be a situation where someone eats ten thousand yen worth of food and then thinks, “I’m still hungry!!”

Additionally, not everyone wants to eat until they’re stuffed. (After all, there are second and third parties to follow, right?!)

Eating to an eight-tenths full stomach is ideal!

Even though it’s a special day for hospitality, it’s unnecessary to prepare food that cannot be finished, and guests shouldn't come to a wedding just for the food, but to celebrate the “happy bride and groom.”

The only thing to care about is the balance of the budget.

It’s okay if the wedding food isn't of the highest rank or if it's at the very bottom among what's served.

Even if there are guests who think, “The food looked cheap” or “They cheaped out,” anyone making negative comments during a celebration is clearly lacking in manners!

It’s the guests who should be held accountable, not the bride and groom, so it’s best to ignore such utterances.

However, it’s different if the use of funds was self-serving.

While I believe a guest criticizing the wedding is the lowest form of class, that holds true when the bride and groom are not at fault.

However, if there are any choices during the wedding that show disregard for the guests, criticism is unavoidable.

For example, if the couple allocated plenty of their budget for themselves, frequently changed outfits, had lavish decorations for the venue, yet skimped on expenses for guest meals, transportation, and favors,

that’s likely to be the target of criticism.

If they’re spending freely on dress prices, necklaces, venue ranks, and performances based on their tastes while limiting expenditures on the guests,

it’s natural to think, “Did they choose that dress hoping for these contributions...” or “Am I supposed to bear the costs of that venue chosen for appearance’s sake with my contributions?”

Thus, it’s crucial to balance how much is spent on personal gains (venue, dress, decor, etc.) and how much is spent on the guests (food, favors, transportation, gratitude, etc.).

It’s an incredibly challenging dilemma to decide on a budget where both the bride and groom and the guests will have no complaints or feel satisfied.

Hoping everyone says, "That was a nice wedding."

A special day that comes only once in a lifetime.

The bride you have dreamed about since childhood.

The day when one is told they are the most beautiful.

The more you gather information, the more things you want to do and dream of appear.

But, there’s the ever-present issue of a limited budget.

Occasionally, I see people complaining about the wedding meals they attended, but

since the wedding venue is selling it as a product or plan, it’s infrequent for them to complain regarding just it being the lowest or mid-range rank. Typically, it’s in comparison to others like

☑ “The food was meager,” or

☑ “The favors were cheap,” or

☑ “The dress seemed the most luxurious,”

are what generally comes up.

There’s no problem if the rankings for the dress, food, and venue align correctly, but if the budget allocation is awry, it could potentially leave some guests feeling slighted, so that must be carefully dealt with.

On this once-in-a-lifetime wedding day, make it without regrets, and ideally prepare for guests to say, “That was a great wedding!”

Let’s work hard to ensure both the bride and groom and the guests can enjoy happy times together♡

If you're deciding on a wedding venue soon,

If you find yourself thinking, “I’ve got a lot of thoughts about the wedding, but I don't know what to do...” or “I haven’t decided on a wedding venue yet...!” consult a venue advisor from marry.

By talking to a venue advisor, they can introduce you to wedding venues that meet your preferred conditions from the select venues that marry has vetted.

The venues we recommend have been individually checked by our team at marry to ensure that “I would recommend this to friends✨” or “I want to visit this venue myself!”

Since it filters down to only wonderful venues from the very first candidate, it allows for efficient venue selection!

You can consult with a venue advisor through the LINE below, so please use it!

➡ Here’s the LINE for the venue advisor♡