What Makes a Wedding Truly Memorable? Where Should You Invest Your Money?

2019.07.04 published

How Can We Have Guests Say "That Was a Great Wedding"?

It’s a common sentiment among all couples getting married: they want their guests to be satisfied when attending their wedding! Since the bride and groom spend over six months (some even up to two years!) preparing for the wedding, it’s only natural that they want to create a culmination of their "couple-ness" condensed in that special time.

On the other hand, since guests take the time to attend the wedding reception, it’s reasonable to want to offer them heartfelt hospitality.

@mochan_40

So, how can we hold a wedding that conveys a sense of hospitality to our guests?

After hearing various opinions from people who attended weddings, the summary conclusion is that many felt that “a wedding where the consideration for guests could be felt was a good wedding.”

To express it simply, feeling consideration for guests means “a wedding that does not cut down on expenses for guests in order to increase the portion spent on ourselves.”

So, what specific items should we allocate money towards to ensure guests are satisfied? Let’s check out the items and the reasons for them!

@ru.023411

Items to Spend Money On for the Guests at the Wedding ① Food

For guests invited to the reception and after-party, the food and drink are very important points they look forward to.

A meal at a high-end hotel or a course prepared by a top chef can be exciting in itself.

Women may care more about the taste of the food, while men seem to gauge their satisfaction based on the variety and quality of the drinks.

Especially for grooms' guests in their 20s to 30s, and relatives in their 40s to 60s, many attend weddings primarily to drink, so it would be great to provide champagne and sake to ensure their satisfaction.

@romin_wedding

Regarding the drink menu, I’ve often heard that while providing a high-end all-you-can-drink option for all guests can significantly raise the budget, calculating based on what was consumed or ordered tends to turn out more economical.

Women might be on a diet or are pregnant or breastfeeding and may be limited to soft drinks, and most guests likely aren’t going to the wedding solely to get drunk, so having everything available and calculating based on actual consumption often leads to higher satisfaction and can actually save money.

Remembering “The food at (name)’s wedding was delicious! We could drink various types of alcohol!” is a memory that doesn't easily fade even after two or three years, so cherishing the food is important for guests to think of the wedding as a good experience.

According to feedback, weddings held at restaurants often have a higher chance of guests considering the food delicious. Many guests might be familiar with a local well-known restaurant, even if they don’t know much about the specific wedding venue, so just hearing the venue's name can bring joy.

Ultimately, the food’s quality is likely determined less by the course rank or ingredients and more by the specific venue (restaurant, hotel, wedding venue, etc.), so it’s best to visit several bridal fairs with tastings to compare and choose a delicious option.

However, balancing the venue's interior, location, and possible performances against the wedding venue's specifications without compromising is quite challenging.

Items to Spend Money On for the Guests at the Wedding ② Favors

Favors that are easy to carry home and practical tend to be extremely popular.

Rather than trying to show originality by personalizing them with names or pictures, it seems safer to choose items that are easy for the recipient to use and generally appreciated.

Items like plates and mugs are practical, but they are also somewhat of a luxury item, functioning like an accessory. There are preferences in design and usability, so accepting that sending anything other than famous brand items may receive mixed reviews from recipients is necessary.

@nagisa_marry

However, if favors become too focused on over-familiar brand-name items, guests might think, “I received this at another wedding....”

*Favors often come as a set of two plates or just one, making it impossible for a family to gather four matching plates in one attendance, so even if they are the same, it may actually be convenient for family use?

On the flip side, it’s important to respect brides' feelings about not wanting to have the same items as someone else's wedding.

Also, if considering spending 500 yen on a small gift, buying a 400 yen item and decorating it with 100 yen may be one approach to hospitality...

But it's likely that receiving a small gift worth a complete 500 yen upfront would make guests happier!

While 500 yen and 400 yen might not show much difference, there will clearly be a visible difference between a 200 yen item and a 300 yen item.

Money spent on decoration expresses the couple's unique flair; money spent on items is hospitality towards guests. So, make sure to organize and allocate the budget accordingly!

@nagisa_marry

Items to Spend Money On for the Guests at the Wedding ③ Transportation Costs

Transportation costs. I believe these should definitely be covered!

I have seen numerous weddings where there were disputes or complaints about transportation costs and accommodation.

Guests usually consider their expenses for attending the wedding as “contributions and attire (clothing and hair).”

In the case of remote locations, expenses for shinkansen, airplanes, and accommodations can become a clear burden; attending one wedding can often cost over 100,000 yen.

Occasionally, I see opinions like “Accommodations only cost around 3,000 yen at a capsule hotel, so why not just pay that?”

But isn’t it a bit sad to imagine making guests coming from afar stay cramped in a capsule hotel just to save costs before or on the joyous occasion of your wedding?

@gift_wd0922

For those using flights or shinkansen and arriving from far away, even if it doesn’t cover the full amount, helping to offset transportation costs while being a considerate host seems like the right thing to do.

A common issue arises in friendly groups: “Since we received transportation costs from (name)’s wedding, should we only compensate for (name) this time?”

This can lead to feelings of inequality, thinking they've paid disproportionately, but “It’s always better to cover transportation costs fairly for everyone!” is the simplest answer.

When a difference is made in the group, it is bound to spread among everyone. This isn't just a matter of who received something or not, but can easily lead to criticism regarding inadequacy or insufficient coverage.

If it’s a close group of friends, it might be good to agree on this when the first person in the group gets married.

For instance, one might say, “Let's never cover transportation costs!” or “Let’s make sure to share the costs (and decide how much).”

@shococo.wd

Ultimately, the spirit of hospitality matters in a wedding. Reducing the budget for invitations just because of tight finances is truly not advisable.

Most people getting married are likely in their 20s to 30s. Even if money is tight at that moment, they can earn and save later, so treating guests well during this once-in-a-lifetime wedding will surely lead to gratitude and a solid reputation, making it a good experience overall!

@sn02060519

So, What Doesn't Affect Guest Satisfaction?

The three major items that influence guests' satisfaction at a wedding are food (drinks), favors, and transportation costs (accommodation costs).

So what specific aspects do not affect guest satisfaction at a wedding?

Based on various opinions, the following items were mentioned:

☑ Photo booth

☑ Rosettes

☑ Paper items

☑ List bouquets

Many, in fact, are items that reflect the bride's creativity and efforts in DIY.

The couple may feel the same way; however, most guests often overlook the finer details of a wedding.

@keiko_marry

The subtle differences in fonts or colors on intricately created items may make women think “That’s cute! They must have put effort into making this,” but whether that directly translates to wedding satisfaction seems unlikely.

Therefore, such decorative items meant to create an ambiance may be better regarded as “expressing the couple’s uniqueness” or “things for the couple to enjoy during the wedding” rather than true hospitality.

@nagisa_marry

A good wedding is created when both guests and the couple are satisfied.

It's not good for the couple to make excessive sacrifices, nor for guests to suffer or shoulder too much burden. The key factor is balance, where both parties can be satisfied and content!

This idea of enriching decoration and unique items is wonderful for both enjoying the wedding and having a joyful preparation period.

@mi.wedding.tm

So Everyone Can Say, "That Wedding Was Fantastic!"

After the wedding is over, how can we ensure that guests think, “Wow, that was a great wedding. It was moving and the food was delicious! Thank you for hosting.”?

I believe that there isn’t just one right answer, and there are as many ideal forms as there are couples.

@chee__wd

This article highlights common points where guests express satisfaction or dissatisfaction at weddings, but it is merely one example.

Weddings are occasions where the couple first collaborates and invites all their guests.

To hold a beautiful wedding that garners genuine blessings and agrees that it was a good wedding, it’s essential to discuss thoroughly what is important and how to spend money together.♡

@little.h___