"How Did You Actually Spend the Day? A Summary of Tips and Insights from Experienced Brides on 'How to Spend Your Wedding Day and Things to Be Mindful Of'"

2017.05.09 published

On the wedding day, it's a series of unknowns!

Hello, I'm Nagisa from marry＊

I had my wedding last year, and it was an incredibly fun and wonderful time ♩

I used to work part-time at a wedding venue and have seen over 700 weddings＊

I've also attended my sister's wedding as a family member, as well as several weddings of friends and colleagues, so I thought I knew more about weddings than the average bride◎

However, even so, there were many things that didn't go as planned on the wedding day! I thought I had prepared thoroughly, but there were surprisingly many surprises on the day itself…!

Even someone like me, who thought she knew a good amount about weddings, experienced various thoughts, so I’m sure brides who are about to have their weddings might be even more anxious than I was. Therefore, this time, I’d like to share the flow of my wedding day in detail＊

I believe the flow varies depending on the wedding venue, but please use this as a reference as one example♩

@nagisa_marry

*About the Wedding*

Before explaining the flow of the day, let me introduce my wedding a bit◎

I had my ceremony, reception, and after-party at a hotel＊

It’s a large, long-established hotel, but part of the hotel has been converted into a guesthouse-like space, and we held everything there◎

So, even though it was a hotel wedding, it felt more like a guesthouse or restaurant wedding, conducted in one space, which I think makes it relatable for any bride♩

Flow of the Wedding Day ① Heading to the Venue

On the wedding day, the first step is to head to the hotel at the designated time◎

I lived with my parents, and planned to start my new life in my fiancé’s new home after the wedding, so I went from my parents' house＊

It was about a 20-minute drive from my house to the hotel. I went there by car with my mother♩

My Mom Suddenly Said, "Let's Take a Photo!"

In the morning, right before heading to the hotel, my mom suddenly said, "Let's take a photo!" and we took a picture in front of our house!

I felt a little reluctant to take the picture without makeup since I would be getting my makeup done at the hotel, but my mom looked so happy.

I ended up thinking it was worth it to capture that moment♡ If there are brides heading to their wedding from their family home, I highly recommend taking a family photo before you leave◎

For the outfit heading to the venue, I wore a white dress. I would change into my wedding dress soon, so I thought anything would be fine, but I still wore something cute＊

Since I wore a gown while getting my hair and makeup done, there wasn’t a specific outfit requirement, but I heard that sometimes you might be asked to wear something that opens in the front, so be cautious＊

Flow of the Wedding Day ② Getting Ready in the Hotel Room (Bridal Room)＊

After arriving at the hotel, I checked into my room◎

I had hired an outside hair and makeup artist, so I used the hotel room as the bridal room＊

I was grateful that I could use it early since I planned to return to that room after the after-party♩

I think there are often restrictions on luggage in a bridal room, but since the hotel room was spacious, I was able to put all my things there, which was very convenient＊

If any brides at hotel weddings are debating between a bridal room or a hotel room, I absolutely recommend using the hotel room for getting ready♩

Surrounded by Many Staff Members... Finally Feeling It's Wedding Day!

Even after arriving at the hotel, I didn't really feel like "it's wedding day," but after meeting with the planner, hair and makeup artist, photographer, videographer, and florist, I finally felt, "Oh, today is my wedding…!"

Because I planned to have a first look with my fiancé, we were supposed to arrive separately, which may have made me feel less in the wedding spirit at that moment...!

In a Fluster Over Communication With My Fiancé!

Since I planned to do a first look with him, I was getting ready in the hotel room while he was in the groom's dressing room＊

I thought I would be nervous about not seeing him until the first look, but he called me multiple times saying, "The reception person might be late!" "Is the photographer there with you?" "Did you see my mom?" "It’s good weather!" "What should we do next?" "Did you finish the profile movie?" and more...!

I somewhat thought we wouldn't communicate until the first look, but he was just casually contacting me!

If you want a touching first look, it might be better to avoid communicating before the first look＊

Flow of the Wedding Day ③ First Look＊

After getting ready, it was time for the first look＊ We conducted the first look in the room◎

It was my fiancé who expressed, "I want to have a first look," so I hadn’t really thought about how we would do it.

So when it came time for the first look, everyone around us was in a fluster!

The planner, photographer, and hair and makeup artist were all saying, "Which side should the bride stand on?" "Is it okay for Nagisa-chan to come up from behind and tap him?" "This side is dark, so please stand by the window!" It was a bit chaotic since I hadn't specified anything…!

Brides who want a first look might find it helpful to communicate in advance how you want it to go◎

We hadn't had an especially emotional first look since we had communicated before and had seen each other's dress selections, but I still felt glad we did it＊

If you’re contemplating a first look, I highly recommend trying it out♩

Flow of the Wedding Day ④ Photo Shooting

After the first look, we had a little bit of time for a photo shoot＊ We were able to take pictures inside the hotel, which was a nice moment♩

I recommend that brides who have time for a photo shoot check for photo spots within the hotel and communicate to the photographer, “I want to take pictures here!”

I especially recommend the hotel lobby and signs＊ You can capture some wedding-like photos♡

Flow of the Wedding Day ⑤ Family Introduction

After a little photo session, it was time for family introductions! This was the first time I met my parents and relatives＊

The family introduction lasted about 10 to 15 minutes. It went by quickly, but it was a wonderful time to feel the connection between both families◎

One common dilemma brides often have during family introductions is whether to allow cameras and videographers in.

Depending on the venue, many places do not allow cameras or video during family introductions, or they charge extra fees.

I had both the photographer and videographer present, and I’m really glad to have captured the warm atmosphere and moments with family and relatives through photos and video＊

After the wedding, when we watched the video with family, we had conversations like, “That person from the other family is~” which was nice to be able to share♩

Flow of the Wedding Day ⑥ Photo Session

After the family introductions, we proceeded directly to a couple's studio shoot and a family group photo＊

The couple's shoot was optional, but since it was a keepsake, I requested it◎ Looking back, I realized there were surprisingly few photos from the front, so I’m glad I did that♩

For the couple's studio photos, we were allowed to choose the background color from about 30 options!

Since there wasn’t much time, I quickly said, "I want pink♡," but if you care about the details, it might be good to ask in advance if you can choose backgrounds◎

Also, capturing a group photo with the family can be quite challenging! It's tough to get about 30 people to all keep their eyes open at the same time!

It's also a bit of a dilemma whether to smile for the photo or remain serious. When people are just being themselves, it’s easy to have serious expressions, so if you want a smiling group photo, be sure to ask the photographer in advance to say, “Let’s take a smiling photo!”♩

Family Group Photos are Best Taken Before the Ceremony Begins!

It seems that family group photos are often taken in two ways:

✓ After the family introductions

✓ After taking a group photo of everyone post-ceremony

In my experience, my venue usually takes photos after the ceremony, but since that would keep the guests waiting, we decided to do it beforehand instead＊

If you have the option, I recommend taking them before the ceremony◎

Flow of the Wedding Day ⑦ Moving to the Venue, Ceremony Rehearsal

After the family studio photo session, we moved to the wedding venue＊

I had my wedding at a hotel, but the venue felt isolated like a guesthouse, so we traveled within the hotel by car♩

Once we arrived at the ceremony venue, we immediately had our ceremony rehearsal＊ The rehearsal was conducted with me and my husband, both sets of parents, and the boy we asked to be the ring bearer along with his parents◎

They Taught Us Various Tips for the Ceremony Flow＊

During the ceremony rehearsal, the pastor and the assistant explained the flow of the ceremony and various tips♩

This was the first time I had thoroughly listened to the ceremony flow. It’s hard to remember everything after just one rehearsal, but since the pastor will guide us during the actual ceremony, I felt reassured◎

What's important during rehearsal is to confirm tips for the ceremony rather than just the flow itself＊ They teach you how to maintain good posture while lowering your veil, how to present your left hand during the ring exchange, and how to face the guests gracefully, among other tips♡

Therefore, during the ceremony rehearsal, I think it’s better to focus on tips to refine your posture rather than just the flow♩

Flow of the Wedding Day ⑧ Ceremony

Once the rehearsal was over, it was time for the ceremony in no time! I headed there without feeling prepared at all…!

Basically, during the ceremony, the pastor or the host for a civil ceremony will guide the flow, so you don’t need to worry about anything particularly◎

Just keeping the tips learned during rehearsal in mind is sufficient!

Enjoy the solemn moment♩

Flow of the Wedding Day ⑨ Flower Shower, Group Photo, Welcome Party

Since I had a garden ceremony, we immediately held the flower shower and bubble shower in the adjacent garden area＊

The flower shower and bubble shower were over in a flash! We took a group photo and then headed into the welcome party◎

At the welcome party, we threw the bouquet and took many photos with our guests＊

Time Flies After the Ceremony!

The time after the ceremony for the flower shower, group photo, and welcome party went by in no time!

There was about a 20-minute welcome party, and I somewhat thought it would be nice to have some time to chat slowly with the guests, but in reality, we were busy taking photos one after another.

Even if 90 guests were divided into groups of about 10, it still takes about 2 minutes to take a photo with each group. That alone would take up 20 minutes! There really wasn’t time to chat leisurely...!

If you're considering having a welcome party, it might be a good idea to allocate a little more time for it◎

Flow of the Wedding Day ⑩ Reception

After the welcome party ended, it was finally time for the reception＊ I had requested a hair change for the reception, so I had that done before it started◎

During the reception, there were also a host and the captain overseeing the proceedings, so there’s no need to worry about anything at all＊

The program included the entrance, profile introduction, cake cutting, toast, mid-ceremony break, re-entrance, dress color guessing quiz, and performances; it was a very enjoyable time◎

After the reception ended, there was an after-party scheduled, during which the photographer quickly took pictures in the garden♡

If there’s a gap before the after-party, it might be nice to take a bit of time to capture some more photos♩

Flow of the Wedding Day ⑪ After-Party

After the reception, the after-party began＊ Since I held it in the same venue as the reception, it was easy without any need to move♩

I changed from my color-changing dress into a white dress and had my hair done for the after-party＊

After-Party: Separated from the Groom!??

The after-party was so much fun and lively, but…

Earlier, the after-party planner (a boss from my time working at the wedding venue, a pro in weddings!) had told me, "At after-parties, the bride and groom often end up separating, but the guests come to see you together, so it would be better to stay together!"

However, right after the toast, my fiancé was whisked away by his friends and was really into it, while I was with my friends taking photos. During the mingling time, we were mostly separated…!

It was a lot of fun, but just as the planner said, it might not be the best for the bride and groom to be separated for too long at the after-party.

The after-party often leads to separation, but do share this with him and try to stay close together during the after-party◎

Flow of the Wedding Day ⑫ Back to the Room & the Next Day

After the after-party, we planned to stay at the hotel, so we headed to our room.

The fun day truly went by in a flash＊ I watched the end roll and looked at the enormous number of photos sent by friends, soaking in the aftermath, while he quickly fell asleep...!

The next day, we had breakfast at the hotel and began packing all the various items. I thought one car would be enough for the packing, but thankfully, we received many balloon congratulations and presents, leading to a situation where we couldn't transport everything in one go…!

Fortunately, I lived nearby and my mother helped with the packing; if distance were longer, we might have needed to use a courier.

Brides who plan to drive home should be cautious as there is a possibility that your luggage will increase on the return trip＊

A Day of Wedding Goes By in a Flash! Keep the Flow in Mind◎

I’ve introduced the flow of my wedding day＊

The day of a wedding can be quite hard to imagine. While you might have an idea of scenes like “family introductions” or “welcome parties,” it’s often difficult to picture the actual flow of the entire day.

Grasping the flow of the day before the wedding starts is really important! Even though you can certainly manage the wedding just by following directions, knowing the day's flow will create more mental space and reduce worries◎

This time, I shared about my wedding, but there are various flows for different weddings＊ Please consider what kind of flow fits you both and create a wedding that reflects your personality♩

@nagisa_marry