"Points of Concern and Questions Guests May Have When Attending a Membership Fee Wedding"

2017.08.06 published

How to Participate in a "Paid Wedding" When You're Invited for the First Time

"I've been invited to a paid wedding, but is it okay to treat it like a regular wedding?" This is a question that seems to come up a lot lately.

While paid weddings have been increasing in recent years, they are still relatively rare.

Many people wonder what the differences are compared to regular weddings. Is the participation fee different from a monetary gift?

So this time, we will thoroughly explain the common concerns guests have when they're invited to a paid wedding♩

If you're a bride planning a paid wedding, please read this article to help ease your guests' concerns＊

Question 1: Do I need to give a monetary gift?

The biggest question guests have when invited to a paid wedding is about the treatment of "monetary gifts," which are generally considered rude not to bring to a normal wedding.

The invitation states the "participation fee" (which often ranges from 5,000 to 20,000 yen＊), but many wonder if that's really all they need to bring.

Paid weddings are structured so that they do not involve monetary gifts.

Therefore, the only thing you need to give to the bride and groom when attending is the specified participation fee. It's perfectly fine not to bring a monetary gift separately.

It might be good for the bride and groom to add a note to the invitation saying, "Please refrain from giving any monetary gifts."

However, there are always considerate guests who think, "I received 30,000 yen for my own wedding, but if the participation fee is 20,000 yen, that means they paid 10,000 yen less than me!"

For those guests, it's recommended to give a small gift worth about 5,000 to 10,000 yen later as a wedding present◎

It's not mandatory to give anything, but aligning the amount with what was received can make everyone feel more comfortable＊

In that case, please graciously accept the gift from the guests♡

Question 2: Do I need a gift envelope?

When it comes to the "participation fee" for a paid wedding, many guests wonder how to present it. Do I need a gift envelope?

You do not need a gift envelope for a paid wedding◎ Since it is not a monetary gift, it's perfectly acceptable to hand it directly to the reception staff from your wallet♩

There’s no need to prepare new bills, but many people do tend to give fresh or clean bills♡

Question 3: What should I wear?

When invited to a paid wedding, guests also wonder if they should dress the same as they would for a regular wedding.

Of course, it’s perfectly fine to coordinate your outfit just as you would for any traditional wedding＊

☑ Dress length should be knee-length

☑ Avoid white (or near-white) clothing

☑ Avoid wearing all black

☑ For daytime events, refrain from exposing shoulders

As long as you follow typical etiquette guidelines, you should be fine♡

➡ Check the detailed guest dress etiquette here＊

Question 4: Will there be gifts to take home?

Guests invited to a paid wedding often mention on social media that they were surprised there were no gifts to take home.

However, this is entirely normal. In most cases, there are no gifts provided at paid weddings.

Therefore, guests should not be shocked or critical if they do not receive any gifts to take home.

Have Your Questions About Paid Weddings Been Answered?

We introduced four common questions guests have when attending a paid wedding＊

The key points guests should keep in mind for paid weddings are just these four:

☑ No monetary gift is necessary

☑ The participation fee should not be placed in an envelope; if possible, prepare new bills

☑ Fashion and grooming should be the same as for regular weddings

☑ Assume no gifts to take home

Even at paid weddings, nothing changes about the celebration itself＊ Since other aspects are just like any regular wedding, it's important not to overthink it because it's a paid event and to genuinely celebrate the couple♡

For brides and grooms planning a paid wedding, it's kind to remember that guests may have these questions and try to provide information that alleviates their concerns♩

May it be a wonderful wedding day for both the participating guests and the couple in the spotlight!♡