When Invited to a Wedding with Children: How Much Should You Gift?

2018.12.11 published

Invited to a Wedding with Children!＊

You may find yourself invited to the weddings of important friends or family, along with your children in the future◎

In such cases, you might wonder, “How much should I give as a wedding gift for my child’s attendance?”

Generally, there is a standard amount for wedding gifts.

＜Example＞

☑ Wedding gift for a friend (1 adult) ➡ 30,000 yen

☑ Wedding gift for friends (couple) ➡ 50,000 yen

So, what should you do when an adult attends with a child?

This time, we will thoroughly explain everything regarding ‘how to calculate the wedding gift when attending with children’ for the future◎

@yco_wed

【Basics】Here’s How to Handle Children’s Wedding Gifts＊

When attending a wedding with children, the basic rule is to simply add the amount for the “children’s meal” to the usual wedding gift!

Here’s a rough estimate for children’s meal wedding gifts:*

＜Example＞

☑ No meal or seating needed (0-2 years): 0 yen

➡ For children aged around 0-2, if no meal is provided, you don’t need to add any extra wedding gift. However, since there might be arrangements for a baby bed or you might disturb the ceremony with loud crying, many people seem to give a gift of around 3,000 to 5,000 yen in addition to the wedding gift.*

☑ Children’s lunch (2-7 years): 5,000-10,000 yen

➡ For young children aged 2-7, it’s common to have meals like omelets or hamburgers served on a single plate,* usually around 5,000-10,000 yen.

☑ Children’s course (5-12 years): 10,000-15,000 yen

Children aged 5-12 might get a mini course featuring salad, soup, meat, and omelets. In that case, you should add about 10,000-15,000 yen.

☑ Course meal (10 years and up): 15,000-20,000 yen

➡ For older children around 10 years or older, they may be served the same meal as adults. In this case, you would add about 15,000-20,000 yen.

Basically, remember that the rule is to add enough to cover the cost of the meal provided for the children◎

Be Careful with "Even Numbers" When Including Children's Money in a Gift Envelope!

You can add the wedding gift for children into the adult gift envelope!

However, there’s something to be cautious about.

Generally, it is considered unlucky to give a wedding gift in even amounts; it is better to give odd amounts (that cannot be divided evenly).

For example, if a family of four attends, a total of 70,000 yen would be okay.

☑ 2 adults (couple 50,000 yen) + a 4-year-old child (children’s lunch 5,000 yen) + a 10-year-old child (children’s course 15,000 yen): total 70,000 yen

However, if an adult gives 30,000 yen and there are two children who would eat around 10,000 yen worth of food, this would simply total 40,000 yen, which is even and therefore considered bad luck.

☑ 1 adult (30,000 yen) + 5-year-old child (children's lunch 10,000 yen): total 40,000 yen

So, what should you do in this case…?

Odd Amounts + Gift Are Recommended!＊

If the total wedding gift of both the adult and child results in an even number…! It’s recommended to round down to a nice odd number and compensate the leftover with a gift.

For example, if the total of the adult and child’s gifts amounts to 60,000 yen, many people round down by 10,000 yen to give a 50,000 yen wedding gift plus a gift of about 10,000 yen later.*

You can express your gratitude by saying something like, “Thank you for inviting my child as well. I’m sorry for any trouble he/she may have caused. But my child seemed to enjoy themselves, and I was so happy you invited us!” as a gift for the child being invited♩

@yuki_txs

【Bonus】It’s Cute to Give Children’s Wedding Gifts in Pocket Envelopes♡

While it’s standard to add children’s gifts to the adult’s wedding gift,

there’s also the idea of putting a small gift envelope (pocket envelope) inside the adult gift envelope and giving the child’s gift separately.*

Especially for children who can write, the bride and groom will surely feel warm seeing the child’s name and “Congratulations” written nicely!♡

However, this method isn’t formal, so it’s best to reserve it for close friends or siblings only.*

Don’t Forget Your Child’s Wedding Gift◎

We’ve introduced how to handle wedding gifts when invited together with children.*

Taking children to a wedding can be quite nerve-wracking, especially when they must remain quiet for a long time.

However, I believe the couple has put much thought into inviting children as well.

Let’s remember to prepare a wedding gift as well, so that everyone can enjoy the celebration comfortably when attending with children◎

➡ List of Articles About Wedding Gifts